5 definitions by pandeism

Top Definition
1. Combining masturbation and prayer, most commonly in the form of praying you don't get caught whacking off in a compromising position.
2. Worshiping God by joyously making use of the self-pleasuring equipment with which thou hast been blessed.
So this one time I was doing some serious masturpraytion over cousin Sophie's bikini photos on Facebook, cause God help me if I get caught whacking off to that.
by pandeism September 29, 2010

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An elusive genre of pornography deemed non-sinful by some slightly less repressed Christian sects on account of it shows actual Christian married couples portraying the parts of actual Christian married couples engaging in the limited set of Bible-approved reproductive sexual activities, for the purpose of providing instruction to purchasers, also supposedly actual Christian married couples. Christian porn films are made under very strict guidelines, and are not to be found at the local pornorama, where they might fall into the hands of masturbating heathens.
I tried to get hold of of some Christian porn, but they wouldn't give me any cause I'm not married. Or Christian. So fuck them.
by pandeism September 30, 2010

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In the theological theory of Pandeism (and occasionally in Deism, rarely in Pantheism) the appellation given to the entity believed to be the Creator of the governing dynamics of our Universe, and the underlying force which sustains our Universe and shares in all of its experience -- a term used to avoid confusion with theistic notions of "God" and all the baggage that term carries.
What's that you say? You're Bible-God is incapable of bringing about our current state of life through evolution by natural selection? And it is only able to experience existence through one man, instead of all men? Then it is doubly inferior to the Deus, which, naturally has such power.
by pandeism January 17, 2011

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1. Combining masturbation and prayer, most commonly in the form of praying you don't get caught whacking off in a compromising position.
2. Worshiping God by joyously making use of the self-pleasuring equipment with which thou hast been blessed.
So this one time I was doing some serious masterpraytion over cousin Sophie's bikini photos on Facebook, cause God help me if I get caught whacking off to that.
by pandeism September 29, 2010

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abbreviation for 'if there is a God who is good and wise and merciful' -- a conceptual form used in discussions contrasting propositions of theism with esoteric ideas of panentheism, pandeism, and panendeism.
Itiagwigawam, then those who try to do good will not be punished for their beliefs alone -- no matter what they do or do not believe.
by Pandeism August 29, 2011

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