2 definitions by oLEW

Top Definition
A derogatory term used to describe a person of Irish descent who lives in a caravan and travels the country. (It should be noted that the term "gypsy" or "romany" is not always accurate to describe these people-traditional Romany types have their roots in Eastern Europe and quite emphatically distance themself from Irish travellers.) no visible means of support although always seems to have a huge wad of ready cash. Opinions vary to the source of their income, but it generally consists of
1/stealing.
2/carrying out shoddy third rate building work for a grossly inflated price, then threatening to get the "boys round" if you wont pay.
3/thats about it....
Usually live in brand new top of the range caravans (stolen) and drive plain white brand new transit vans/pickups.(also stolen and uninsured. if you get hit by one out on the road, you've had it, what they will do is suggest you come round the campsite to sort it out, where they will beat seven bells out of you as a form of compensation) They will site their caravans on any available land, regardless of ownership, from the farmer's field to B&Q's carpark, and tend to know the law better than the police regarding squatter's rights. they usually show their appreciation to the landowner by dumping vast quantities of rubbish, human faeces, etc on the land before they leave.
They have recently made a great study of European union Human rights legislation and with the help of conscienceless money hungry lawyers have fought many court battles regarding why they don't need to make planning applications like the rest of us.
Despite contibuting nothing to the economy of their present country of residence, they are quick to complain when their children dont seem to get an education, when they are turfed off private land, etc.
They like to portray the image of a hard done by ethnic minority that is the victim of racial discrimination, citing the reason that ordinary people dont understand their way of life, they are really cheerful romany travellers, honest as the day is long, butter wouldnt melt, etc, failing to appreciate the fact that regular people are really not that gullible.
When not carrying out tarmaccing jobs, gardening etc, the pikey may supplement their income by stealing cars, either selling it on, stripping for parts or weighing it straight in for scrap, along with lead from church roofs, cast iron railings from outside schools, brass plaques from gravestones and their last transit van that got recognised by its legitamate owner.
Some modern pikeys are being extremely sly, choosing instead to live in houses like real people, either buying outright for cash, or playing on the local authority's duty to someone who claims to be homeless. Living in houses does not change their ways however, and they are still likely to steal from their neighbours, as you can find out when the stereo from your car that was broken into appears as if by magic in their transit van.
Pikeys are best avoided at all costs, unless you are extremely hard, and have a lot of hard mates. when challenged alone, your average pikey will be a spineless piece of shit who would rather run, but be warned their credo is "strength in numbers" and he will soon turn up at your place with 100 of his smelly unwashed mates, keen to bring you round to their way of thinking by use of fists, baseball bats, etc. Police are equally terrified of them and the traditional way in which they are dealt with by police is to move them onto a different area where they will be someone else's problem.
The recent huge influx of pikeys from Ireland is a direct result of legislation bought in by the Irish government effectively outlawing their way of life, and the uk's open door immigration policy is like a welcome mat.
If you live in a remote farmhouse and feel at risk of pikey attack, be sure to have a shotgun handy, its no less than they deserve- nobody likes being stolen from, after all, Essex people got fed up with them a couple of years back and torched their campsite one night.
Be warned, the only time a pikey will speak to you is if he thinks he can rip you off, get something for nothing, or just steal something you have that he wants.
HGV drivers in particular regularly hear the pikey's distinctive call "d'ye have any spare diesel, sor?", however, they will at least pay for it, offering you £10 for 50 gallons which they extract with a high-speed electric pump and oil drum in the back of their transit. If you decline their generous offer, they will likely turn up a little later and help themselves anyway.
so to sum up. thieving, parasitic, respecter of neither people or property, what they cant use they will destroy.
The traditional reaction of any criticism is "come round the campsite, we'll soon change your mind"
PIKEY:"we were doing a tarmaccing job up the road and the machine fell over, we have all dis tarmac to get rid of before it sets, do ye want yer driveway done? only tree hundred pound"
Homeowner "yes sure"
pikey: "ok, we finished, dat's six hundred pound. pay it or we'll come back and born yer house down"
Homeowner's shotgun "KABOOM"

Pikey pulls up in 7.5 ton lorry. "can ye sell me some diesel? I've not got enough to get to de services, I have an account there"
"yeah right, you drove past the petrol station 20 yards away to come and ask me that"

pikey:"want to boy a new laptop? only 50 pound"
person: "no thanks, you'll give me a bag with a housebrick in it or something"
by oLEW December 28, 2007

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A small car manufactured by the Subaru motor company from 86-94, the justy was unique in its market sector by having switchable 4 wheel drive via a button on the gearstick.
Uk models were all 1200cc 3 cylinder 4 wheel drive in either 3 or 5 door hatchback, whilst other markets had the option of a 1000cc front wheel drive only.
Although lacking the ground clearance to be a serious off roader such as a land rover, the 4wd justy is a capable performer in mud and snow, and in 1200 form was unique in producing 1bhp per cubic inch (73 bhp)
In addition to the manual transmission a CVT automatic was also available, using a system similar to the Dutch DAF variomatic.
The 3 cylinder Justy was replaced in 1995 by a new model which was a re-badged suzuki swift, in one trim level only, 1.3 GX featuring a 1300cc engine and a permanent Suzuki 4 wheel drive system,equipped with a central differential. In normal driving the front wheels provide traction, the rears only driving when loss of traction occurs to the front. The vehicle was built by Suzuki in Hungary and had no Subaru input apart from the badging. In many ways an inferior vehicle to the older justy, it had more up to date styling but had noticeably worse fuel economy and performance, courtesy of lower gearing and extra weight of the 4wd system, and the vehicle as a whole was dynamically inferior to most other cars in its rather high price range. production finished in 2002 and an all new Justy is due for launch shortly.
1996 subaru justy 1.3 GX
1.3 litre 8 valve OHC
67bhp
standard equipment includes central locking, remote boot release, cup holder, dual front airbags, all wheel drive system, rear wash/wipe, radio cassette
by oLEW December 28, 2007

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