An anxious, delusional mother who enjoins her child to behave by making fantastic claims about the likely consequences of her child's misbehavior. Like the board game Mouse Trap, her claims involve a series of improbable events, ending in disaster.
Mouse Trap Mom: Bobby, stop jumping around! The people in line are holding coffee, and if you bump into them, they are going to spill coffee all over your face, and then you'll be scarred for life, like Seal, except you won't be able to sing well, since you'll break your vocal chords when you cry from the hot coffee burns, so no girls will like you. Out of desperation you'll awkwardly start experimenting with guys. You'll get really drunk one night and have rough sex with a guy in a Chelsea bar and then your ass will be tore up like goatse
. You'll never be able to shit right, again, so you'll have to stay away from beans and rice, which is a shame, because they would have prevented you from getting intestinal cancer. So you'll get it and die alone when you are 37. So stop fucking jumping around.
A chromosomal disorder which causes one to both appear as if one has down syndrome
and also to pull off some amazing dance moves. People with get down syndrome are funny looking. This has lead evolutionary biologists to speculate that it is only by being able to dance incredibly well that people with get down syndrome are able to attract mates and procreate, albeit sloppily.
That funny looking asian guy in the glasses can bust a move
like no other! He must have get down syndrome!
A well used (and therefore wet) condom that a male discovers on his penis once he awakens from post-coital slumber. A wet hat typically results from a particularly aggressive sexcapade, which causes the male to collapse into a slumber immediately after ejaculating but before he has the chance to remove his spunk filled, vaginally lubricated scabbard.
Jon: I was fucked up on a lot of tequila and triple sec last night and ended up boning the hell out of Kate a few times. I think we ended up using a bunch of rubbers and the rest of my xtc, too.
Joe: Fuck! Did you have to cuddle afterwards?
Jon: Nah, I got pretty lucky -- I totally fell asleep right away. But I did have to deal with a wet hat in the morning.
A prized but elusive state of intoxication where one's strength, courage, wit, and acumen (especially in matters of whether it is prudent to fuck a given jersey whore
) are greatly enhanced, rendering one an invincible luminary in comparison to others. Being drunkvincible has been known to be a decisive advantage in bar brawls, thwarting crime, and discerning, prior to insertion, which whores have STIs.
Mugger 1: give us all your money!
Mugger 2: we have guns!
Mugger 3: big guns! <revealing shot gun>
Drunkvincible Friend 1: fuck off motherfuckers -- in fact, you better give us all your money before we fuck your moms in the asses!
Drunkvincible Friend 2: and bite off their filthy fucking clits!
Muggers 1-3: jesus, let's get the hell out of here! those guys are fucking crazy! they must be drunkvincible! <running away>
A mixed drink made of gin and gatorade, chock full of electrolytes and party. This admixture of rye based beverage and sports drink is well suited for a drunkscapade
involving much physical activity and drinking. While Gatorade's slogan is, "is it in you?", Ginorade's slogan is "is it gin you?".
Friend 1: Yo, got anything to mix with this cheap ass Gordon's gin? I'm a pussy and can't take it straight.
Friend 2: Shit, I just ran out of OJ
and purple drink
. How about some gatorade
for a ginorade? That shit will keep you busting moves all night.
To cheese someone is to place cheese on this person's head or in this person's hair. Any kind of cheese can be used for cheesing, though there is a venerable tradition of using warm, partly melted swiss or provolone.
Fuckabout 1: Go on, you have to cheese him soon!
Fuckabout 2: .... OK. <puts cheese in man's hair>
Man from Kent: You are a FUCKING DISGRACE!
Fuckabouts 1&2: Have you seen someone who could use this food? We cheesed some high-strung geezer earlier and now we're trying to do something good for someone to make up for it.
Woman: You what?
Fuckabouts 1&2: We put cheese in a man's hair.
Woman: Oh, you cheesed him. You are a couple of fuckabouts -- it's douchy to cheese someone. You've to set your karma right by helping the homeless.
A cheap, musical alternative to prozac, useful for curing depression. Musical prozac consists of much time spent listening to most excellent tunes until you no longer feel like shit.
Friend 1: Last night kind of sucked ass. Sure, after all that ginorade
I got that free welcome mat and that Johnny Cash
poster I always wanted, but I missed the chance to have a meaningful goodbye with my friend! And she's moving away! I'm so depressed now. I need some prozac but I don't have health insurance because this country doesn't give a fuck about my well-being.
Friend 2: No worries, man. Just take some musical prozac.
Friend 1: What do you recommend?
Friend 2: Well, you could pop some XTC
and listen to trance. Or how about "I got a feeling" by Black Eyed Peas
? Anything by Matt and Kim
would do the trick.
Friend 1: Dude, all those recommendations sound kind of gay
Friend 2: Yeah but 'gay' isn't just about what you dream of being with me, douchebag
, it also means the same as 'happy', and it means that for a reason.