9 definitions by missadventure
The name given to the activity of shitting really fast. Especially used by disorganised people who dont have the shit-management gene and usually find themselves running to the bog hoping to 'send a sausage to the seaside' quickly because theyve got more important things to do.
Also used by internet junkies who find that logging on acts like a laxative and makes them want to 'log off'.
Often used to describe the vast quantities of crap produced by the above mentioned activity.
Also used by internet junkies who find that logging on acts like a laxative and makes them want to 'log off'.
Often used to describe the vast quantities of crap produced by the above mentioned activity.
You should have seen it mate, I had a turboshit and it was poking out of the pan!
Ive got 30 seconds before she gets here, ill have a turboshit, no time to wash my hands.
Ive got 30 seconds before she gets here, ill have a turboshit, no time to wash my hands.
by missadventure November 4, 2006
Used to describe a sexual position used in foreplay where the man stands behind the woman, with his left hand on her left nipple, and his right hand on her vagina.
The man then proceeds to manipulate both parts of her body with the first and second fingers on each hand in a rhythmic fashion, ensuring that her nipple is gently squeezed between both fingers.
The position and action simulates that experienced by a double bass player.
The man then proceeds to manipulate both parts of her body with the first and second fingers on each hand in a rhythmic fashion, ensuring that her nipple is gently squeezed between both fingers.
The position and action simulates that experienced by a double bass player.
by missadventure October 26, 2006
An irritating individual that you call a friend but you don't really get on with due to
a) the fact they are a sponger
b) they constantly backstab you and all of your real friends
c) they have an artificial sense of superiority, which comes from them reading one book, making them an instant expert on a subject
d) they only know you when they want something major(ref sponger)
e) they are a transparent manipulator
f) they show unashamed arrogance when displaying their worldy knowledge to others.
Psychologically unbalanced, they struggle to take control of their life, and in the process compensate by controlling other peoples.
Often spotted by these character traits: Narrow minded, open mouthed, short on social skills and tells tall stories.
a) the fact they are a sponger
b) they constantly backstab you and all of your real friends
c) they have an artificial sense of superiority, which comes from them reading one book, making them an instant expert on a subject
d) they only know you when they want something major(ref sponger)
e) they are a transparent manipulator
f) they show unashamed arrogance when displaying their worldy knowledge to others.
Psychologically unbalanced, they struggle to take control of their life, and in the process compensate by controlling other peoples.
Often spotted by these character traits: Narrow minded, open mouthed, short on social skills and tells tall stories.
by missadventure November 1, 2006
A shortened version of the phrase 'Jimmy Hill', which is used when expressing ones disbelief at an apparent lie. Taken from using Jimmy Hill extensively to the point where one can't be bothered saying both words and uses just 'Jimmy', or shortened further to 'jaard'.
Accompanied with the rubbing of ones chin at approximately arms length. The size of ones disbelief can be expressed by the amount of reach obtained by stretching the arm as long as possible, and the louder and shorter the 'jaard' sound.
Accompanied with the rubbing of ones chin at approximately arms length. The size of ones disbelief can be expressed by the amount of reach obtained by stretching the arm as long as possible, and the louder and shorter the 'jaard' sound.
steve:'I caught a 38 pound pike yesterday'
dave: 'yeah, right, jaaaaaaard'
george bush : 'youve got weapons of mass destructionism'
saddam : 'jaard!'
dave: 'yeah, right, jaaaaaaard'
george bush : 'youve got weapons of mass destructionism'
saddam : 'jaard!'
by missadventure October 11, 2006
To ejaculate with some force at the start of an intense orgasm.
The name comes form the force with which the initial spurt of baby batter ejected from the cock appears, causing the owner to experience bollock recoil.
The name comes form the force with which the initial spurt of baby batter ejected from the cock appears, causing the owner to experience bollock recoil.
He felt her squirm on top of his throbber and clamped her flaps just as he began to chubb.
His mother came into his room just in time to catch him chubb all over his hand and keyboard
His mother came into his room just in time to catch him chubb all over his hand and keyboard
by missadventure November 4, 2006
A person who repeatedly borrows things. Often a person who also doesnt return them and adopts the attitude that you exist solely as a free equipment supply warehouse.
This stems from an underlying attitude problem where the person believes they will get away with whatever they can, to get through life.
This is not to be confused with genuine forgetfulness, where a person will feel openly guilty when borrowing from you and will buy their own gear immediately afterwards.
This person comes under the category as a pseudofriend
Possible solutions include openly embarrasing the person infront of others, or lend them broken gear. Embarrasment doesnt always work as they have no pride in themselves, and they will always return something that's broken as they will have no use for it.
This stems from an underlying attitude problem where the person believes they will get away with whatever they can, to get through life.
This is not to be confused with genuine forgetfulness, where a person will feel openly guilty when borrowing from you and will buy their own gear immediately afterwards.
This person comes under the category as a pseudofriend
Possible solutions include openly embarrasing the person infront of others, or lend them broken gear. Embarrasment doesnt always work as they have no pride in themselves, and they will always return something that's broken as they will have no use for it.
What a bloody sponger?! Every day he asks to borrow something and I never get it back.
Sod off! I'm not a walking stationery shop you sponger!
Sod off! I'm not a walking stationery shop you sponger!
by missadventure November 1, 2006
Of unstable sexual orientation. Usually a botanical term used to describe a plant that can be either male or female, but can be used to describe a persons sexual instability. Used to describe people who prefer both men and/or women, but change their mind on a daily basis.
Not often used by everyday people, only by those who crave attention from their peers and want to appear clever.
Not often used by everyday people, only by those who crave attention from their peers and want to appear clever.
I dunno, yesterday you fancied him, now its her, you know what you are, you're polygamadioecious, thats what.
by missadventure November 2, 2006