It's what a fuck would look like if it had a face.
You're the pure definition of fuckface!
An alternative method of playing Call of Duty: Black Ops that involves playing said game while sitting on the toilet taking a dump.
Player 1: (making grunting noises) Two guys heading for the C flag.
Player 2: Dude are you okay over there?
Player 1: Yeah, I'm just shitting while playing.
Player 2: How's your brown ops coming along?
Player 1: Pretty good. Apparently dropping a deuce is helping my KD ratio.
The sexual position involving the anal doggystyle position while the recipient has explosive diahhrea. In theory, once the giver pulls out, the receiver's ass would give way causing massive amounts of sticky sewer chili to explode all over the place.
Rod: Hey how was your date with Josie?
Todd: It was awesome, first we got dinner at taco bell, then we went to her apartment. Luckily her mom wasn't home, so we fucked on her mom's bed. It was pretty messy afterwards.
Rod: Eeeww, she was on the rag?
Todd: No, she had diahhrea from the taco bell we ate. It flared up while she was letting me give her anal.
Rod: Haha yall did the gun packet?
Todd: Yeah. There was shit all over her moms bed when I left, so I don't think I'm allowed over there anymore!
The act of receiving a blowjob while shitting and playing call of duty: black ops all in unison.
My wife gave me a blumpkin while I was playing black ops on the shitter. That's my first time ever receiving a black ops blumpkin!
A pisstergeist is the name of an unexplainable phenomenon that causes one to have to urinate constantly despite there being no change in one's liquid intake.
Jeff: I can't seem to go more than ten minutes without having to piss like a mofo.
Dave: You're not a drinker are you?
Jeff: Exactly. I think I'm being haunted by a pisstergeist!
The type of revenge you get on birds for shitting on your car.
The preferred method is by going up to a birds nest, waiting for the mother bird to leave her eggs, climbing up to a sturdy limb right above said nest and taking a shit on the birds nest.
Works best if you have diarrhea.
If the mother bird still hasn't returned to the now defaced nest, feel free to take any eggs that haven't broken home for some awesome scrambled eggs. Just make sure to clean the shit off of them first.
Jack: Dude you were pretty pissed at those birds that crapped on your newly waxed car last week.
Kyle: Yeah but the next day I found a birds nest and got me some sweet birdy revenge.
Jack: You shit on some birds?
Kyle: Nope. Just the nest. There were some yummy looking eggs in there too, so I was thinking " Hey free breakfast"!
A closet dumbass is someone who will talk nonstop, regardless of the subject, and make like they know everything about said subject even if they know little to nothing about it, for pure sake of staying in the conversation.
An obvious way to catch someone you suspect as a closet dumbass is to ask them about something that you already are well versed on and watch them stumble as you contradict them when they're wrong.
Rob: ...so anyways that's why I'm a big fan of Dio.
(Eric walks up to join the conversation)
Eric: Yeah me too. Im a huge fan.
Rob: No you're not. You've never even heard of Dio.
Eric: Yeah I am. In fact I just saw them in concert last month.
Josh: Last month? Horseshit! Dio died last year.
Rob: Yeah really, Eric. You're such a closet dumbass!