1. A person who practices the religion of Judaism, regardless of his or her ethnicity.
2. A person who was raised in a Jewish family and considers himself an ethnic Jew.
3. A person who is intelligent and has an above average dick, but who doesn't brag about it because he doesn't want to make his Christian friends jealous.
I don't go to temple, but my father was Jewish. If you want to call me a Jew, that's fine with me.