The best years of your life, not your teenager years, wtf is that? It is a time when you have no real homework, your games are your life, your bedroom is your secret hideout, stress is non-existent, and the world is fluid-like.
When I was 6 I was king of childhood. I rode on my air gorilla in the wavy grass in the sunlight each noon. I used to ride on my grandpa's tractor to the farmer's market, where everyone was bright, kind, and innocent. Now, I'm 13, and it's shit. My house sucks, my bed sucks, my school sucks, my friends are cunts, all because I'm not 4 years old anymore.
A poorly funded attempt at education, planned out by the government. First, every student there is an ass. Generally inconsiderate, make really gay-as-shit jokes, and pretend to get high off of blunts wrapped from post-it notes. Second, the classic beast, homework. This shit is almost undefinable, it has no weaknesses, and you *have* to do it, or else, as the "teachers" say, you're fucked. Third, the girls. These are the ones that add drama to bullshit, reward each other for shit they didn't do, make too much fucking noise, sing shitty songs nobody listens to, and always say, "It's cold in here!". Fuck you.
Some little side notes, the dog shit food they feed you, sucks ass, unless you bring you're own lunch, but that sucks ass too. And in science class, they make you do some really tardass experiments, like filling a cup with water, putting that yeast shit in there, and lighting a match over it to see if it will burn. GAY.
Girl: Man, it is like, freezing in here!
Another girl: Yah I know, right, it's freezing in here!
Me: (Climbs on top of school and pours gasoline down the air duct, then throwing a lit match on it.)
Girl: What's that smell?
Me: Ain't cold anymore, is it dipshit?
God I hate school.
The source of all sesame chicken.
Big Bird is the source of all sesame chicken.
A bread box is the sexual act of shoving a rolled up slice of natural home-made bread inside your partners vagina, allowing her juices to soak into the bread, while at the same time jerking the bread back and forth to pleasure her, then pulling out the bread and eating it.
I built a time machine, then went back in time and gave Marylin Monroe a bread box.
When there is a hobo sitting on the end cap of the parking lot, you are so fascinated by how poor he is you forget to put on the brakes and your front wheel ruins his testicles.
Me: Hey Travis, you know the hobo sitting in Taco Bell's parking lot?
Me: I totally Ball Parked that dude!
I have to go to school? Fuck you dude, that is a fail idea.
Public education is a failed system.
If my teacher fails me, I will gladly insert myself into her anus.
When your zit gets so huge and then gets infected so that it represents a large, pus leaking, granny smith apple.
Travis: Hey man, look at this huge zit on my face.........
Me: Holy shit Travis, that's a pus yucky pus apple you're carryin'!