A hickey so bad that it hurts for at least a week. Often black or deep red in color, an Elbert is tender to the touch, and resembles a bite mark or an actual injury. An Elbert may be induced by mean spirited biting or by overly aggressive sucking on the neck.
It is impossible to disguise an Elbert with any form of makeup, and to treat an Elbert with Preparation H or any other traditional hickey remedy.
Guy: “Oh my God, did you get hit with a baseball?”
Pale girl; “No, it’s a hickey.”
Guy: “Well, that’s quite the Elbert.”
Pale girl: “Oh, how true.”