A hobbits sex toy.
The Hobbit put her batteries in her Bilbo, closed the bedroom door and wasn't seen again until the sun rose over the shire.
A three man elaborate fuck. One guy is wrapped in clingwrap and fucked up the arse by another guy then leans forward adopting the position of a giant penis. The "penis guy" is then used to fuck a bucket fanny while being held back on a rope by the third guy who is also naked and wankining off into a jam jar.
The dirty little cunt was happy to have a JK Dunky Fuck as it was the only way her bucket fanny could get any sensation. Penis guy wasn't so sure but was game for a laugh.
Not concentrating during the sexual act and finding yourself lost in the dark recesses found beneath the gunt.
I was hot, roaring hot, vomiting with the heat, my every cell protesting as it bucked against the impositions of the atmosphere, and instantly I knew I was caught in a gunt trap.And I was flesh-and-blood, organic, heaving in torment, my breathing corpse in rebellion against the impossible demands being made upon it, this while I fought to control the hot Gunt bucking in my hands, a piece of flesh which I identified as a gunt flap. Crushed by heat. Annihilated by the light of the sky. I should have looked, then. Upwards, I mean. At the sky. At the light. But I didn't. Instead, I dropped the gunt flap. And flinched. Downwards. Squeezing my eyes shut. Trying to squeeze myself into annihilation. Trying to hide. I made my way towards the relative safety of the vulva and hopefully freedom.
A girl in the office you drool over but won't look at twice in the real world.
She is Office Fit, face like an arse and tits like two plastic bags full of custard, but I'd still give her a portion.
The false impression of a moustache when giving head.
She was sucking deep, the head of my cock massaging the inner recess of her throat, just as I was about to blow my load I looked down and there between my legs was what looked like Groucho Marx. I was relieved to find it was just her Gobble Tash.
The scum sucking cutomer at a twenty four hour service station that expects the attendant to get out of his seat to serve food at 2am when you are half way through a twelve hour night shift
The Monkey Cunt wanted food from the back of the store, he should know I only serve petrol,no food.
To place your face between two huge tits shake your head and blow, resulting in the famous Bill and Ben catch phrase "flobberdobberdobberdobber"
As I slowly encroached apon her hugh pendulous bussom I felt compelled to perform a Bill and Ben. I buried my face in the soft comfort of her breasts, blew hard and... "flobberdobberdobberdobber"