9 definitions by jonno

right royal pissed, falling down drunk, too gone to care, the best state that man can achieve via 10 cans super lager
he was totally stocious , so he was, an there was no use tae him
by jonno June 17, 2006
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The new word to replace the tiresome "pissed" "hammered" or plain old "drunk"
by jonno March 9, 2005
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Derived from the phrase 'you chubby thing'
"Your putting on some podge there"
"You're looking podgy"
"She is cute and podgy"
by jonno April 13, 2004
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Usually found at the free party, wearing either a dark hoody or some variation of hippy clothing made from 'hemp' or whatever. The Hedge monkey won't make any sense if spoken to, instead they will blurt out a mish-mash of random words all muddled together before laughting a little, pulling a rediculous contorted face, swaying a bit and taking a swig from the spliff in their left hand and trying to smoke the can of special brew in their right.
It is not uncommon to see crusty lumps of ketamine amalgomated with snot on the hedge monkeys nose.
A hedge monkeys hair is usually home to many animals and used as a home by local birds and cats.
Hedge monkeys have their own dance, a strange repetitive forward-backward motion, like you'd imagine an insane person to do. usually to psy-trance, techno, acid tecnho, gabba etc...
Are you coming to the free party to hedge it with us?

Look at that hedger, she's set her legs on fire with her poi-chains

The club had more hedge monkeys than all of Goa
by jonno January 16, 2004
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someone who is grown up but is terrified of certain things, e.g spiders, aeroplanes, the dark
He is some big girls blouse, a spider ran up his leg and he nearly shit on himself.
by jonno February 19, 2004
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You knocked over my vase. You’re such an Eebo
by jonno May 1, 2022
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