A bizarre and disturbing affliction restricted to the female population and brought on by rapid aging/degeneration. Sufferers develop vertically lined, Pinocchio-like semi-detached mouths that may or may not be operated using invisible strings above their heads. The super-morbidly obese are normally safe from Puppet Mouth, with the notable exception of brontosaurus-boned Heather from Eastenders.
'Hell, Jools, can you turn the channel over? I can't look at that old crow Deirdre's Puppet Mouth any longer, it's ruining Corrie for me!'
A frenetic, desperate foxtrot often performed by those who have imbibed a popular, over-the-counter laxative. Designed to keep the trains outside the station, 'dancers' frequently 'feel the rhythm' when the prospect of reaching a public convenience in time is remote.
'Man, did you see that guy working it on the Tube. I think he was doing the dulco dance!'