4 definitions by houdinimasterfive

Top Definition
A towel used to soak up your jizz once you get turned on by something extremly sexy like blood on the dance floor or oldmen walking their tiny dogs while riding their scooters. A portable version of a jizz towel is the new and improved handy jizz rag.
Example one: "jarrod matthew is so amazing and his eyes are so yummy, I luvers him"

"jeez dude, get your fucking jizz towel ready"

Example two: -riding in the car- "HOLYWALNUTS! did you just see that bilboard with Morgan Freemen?!"

"dude... I got this handy portable jizz rag for you to use"
by houdinimasterfive August 25, 2009

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A phrase moms use to wake up their kids for pointless things in the morning.
mommy: DAY LIGHT IN THE SWAMP
kid: Damn, It's like 7:30 am and she's waking me up to see a therapist
by houdinimasterfive August 25, 2009

The Urban Dictionary Mug

Lotsa space for your liquids.

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

Lotsa space for your liquids.

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

Your favorite word on a white mug.

Create a mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

One side has the word, one side has the definition. Microwave and dishwasher safe. Lotsa space for your liquids.

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Smooth, soft, slim fit American Apparel shirt. Custom printed. 100% fine jersey cotton, except for heather grey (90% cotton).

Buy the t-shirt
Moms in their late fourties who listen to eminem with young children in the car..
Mom: MY MOM LIKE VALLIUM AND LOTS OF DRUGS!
Kid: Seriously, Mom?...your such a meminem
by houdinimasterfive August 25, 2009

The Urban Dictionary Mug

Lotsa space for your liquids.

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

Lotsa space for your liquids.

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

Your favorite word on a white mug.

Create a mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

One side has the word, one side has the definition. Microwave and dishwasher safe. Lotsa space for your liquids.

Buy the mug

The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

Buy the t-shirt

The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Smooth, soft, slim fit American Apparel shirt. Custom printed. 100% fine jersey cotton, except for heather grey (90% cotton).

Buy the t-shirt
A yellow ruite 66 limited PT cruiser with hippy stickers and a shroom sticker (that still needs to be put on) with a cock humping a shark hanging of the rear view window. Sex on Wheels has it's downsides though; they usually end up being cursed and accident probed due to people staring deeply at it's sexiness.
kid: your mom can take us to mcdonalds tonight right?
me: yeah but it might not be safe, people are always staring at her sex on wheels
by houdinimasterfive August 25, 2009

The Urban Dictionary Mug

Lotsa space for your liquids.

Buy the mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

Lotsa space for your liquids.

Buy the mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

Your favorite word on a white mug.

Create a mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

One side has the word, one side has the definition. Microwave and dishwasher safe. Lotsa space for your liquids.

Buy the mug

The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

Buy the t-shirt

The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Smooth, soft, slim fit American Apparel shirt. Custom printed. 100% fine jersey cotton, except for heather grey (90% cotton).

Buy the t-shirt