5 definitions by hodag1966

Top Definition
The moment your chubber crosses the line to become a full-fledged hard-on
Damn, the teacher called me to the blackboard seconds after I crossed the schwingularity. I was so embarrassed. How's that for bad timing?
by hodag1966 October 11, 2015
Person who unwillingly is included on a group text that blows up.
Last night I was a victim of a driveby volley of texts that I had no interest in. I hate being an innocent bytexter. Next time I hope they leave me off their lame back-and-forth texts.
by hodag1966 October 11, 2015
A person on a back-and-forth text thread who willingly contributes nothing to the ongoing banter, ignores it all, and wishes he had not been included from the get-go.
Dude, I walk away from my phone for 15 minutes and come back to 20 lame texts from you guys. I'm an innocent bytexter! PS: You guys aren't funny.
by hodag1966 October 11, 2015
A father who truly enjoys playing with his young children for extended periods of time, even while sober.
Russ: Chris said he had a great time at the Great Wolf Lodge this weekend playing in the pool with his 4-year-old twins.

Ted: And he said he didn't even drink! What a fuckin' feather!
by hodag1966 February 01, 2014
A proud and loud mother who incorrectly thinks that everyone within earshot (and beyond) wants to hear the "adorable" conversation she is having with her small, "precious" child. Plouders are particularly prevalent on airplanes.
"All I wanted to do is sleep on the plane, but instead I had to hear a plouder talk to her daughter about clouds and other boring shit. I thought about turning around and complaining, but then I would have looked like a total dick."
by hodag1966 January 31, 2014
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