180 definitions by gnostic1

n. Person possessing no desire to advance at work or in society; needlessly apathetic human encumberance.

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Are you still going out with that bog squatter?

He's not a bog squatter! He's an artist. Why do you hate me?

I was just asking.
by gnostic1 October 12, 2011

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n. two or three holes "hacked" into the ice at each end of an ice curling rink to give the sweepers somewhere to rest their brooms. Also:

v. what smokers do while curling, which is one of the few Olympic sports where smoking is allowed during the game.

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Throw some end-raise take-out weight and I'll sweep from the hack!

Hurry hard!
by gnostic1 October 03, 2011

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place. Refreshing Canadian village untouched by time, grime or crime.

Situated on a gravelly glacial morraine just out of sight of the majestic Rocky mountains and very close to the rich fertile earth of Benalto Eckville's lack of oil deposits have kept it from the neo-industrialisation that has despoiled much of Alberta. Eckvillians, untouched by the trappings of ostentatious wealth displayed by their consanguinous neighbours in Benalto, revel in their Amish-like attachment to aging wooden vehicles and small poultry holdings. Nestled in their wooded canyon, well-served by an ice-highway in winter and government motor-sled service in summer, Eckville has become a haven for performance artists, accordian troupes and genetically modified geese enthusiasts.

A very camp "Bavarian Lawn Ornament Festival" featuring displays of Austrian Gnomes and Miniature Jockeys is held at the Putsch Hall in even-numbered years and usually attracts a good number of older germanic gentlemen holding boldly decorated beer steins and youg busty-blausen co-eds with shaved heads.

Clubs devoted to hunting elk, pond hockey, rock sorting, gravel amassing and duck breeding help to keep the populace amused through the long winters.

The long-planned Holocaust Memorial is on hold, since the needed permits have been denied, but a new windshield chip repair shop will open in the fall of 2012 to provide some needed jobs and bring some outsiders off the road.

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I'm nearly out of gas Sophie. Why don't we drive a few miles off the beaten path and get some gas and a few bags of gravel in Eckville?

Good choice Saul! If we're lucky the Rock Festival is this weekend.
by gnostic1 July 08, 2011

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n. elaborate or deceptive underwiring in intimate garments.
Don't be fooled. Those girls in I.T. are getting a lot of help from tech support.

It can be hard to navigate in a wireless mode when you're used to a lot of tech support.
by gnostic1 September 18, 2010

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Exuberant exhortation shouted at the skips during curling sets at the end of each over just before the corn broomers put their rings in the house.

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Hurry hard! The shot rock is going to wreck on a slug!

You weren't hurrying hard; you were hardly hurrying.
by gnostic1 October 05, 2011

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place. Cosmopolitan Albertan city ideally located where the heart of the glacial gravel deposits meet the shoulder of the Rocky Mountain alluvial boulder accretions. Industry is quite diversified. Factories where large limestone rocks are pummeled into dust for concrete manufacturing stand arm-in-arm with factories where gravel is carefully sieved for concrete manufacturing.

David Thompson, a Welshman posing as a Scottish Hudson Bay surveyor under an assumed accent, is honoured with a museum and re-created wooden fort on the less-dusty side of town. Each summer a festive re-creation of the stripping of the area's resources by Europeans with an exaggerated sense of entitlement is staged by local actors dressed as fur traders. Lemonade is available.

Shooting Wapiti, deer, rapids, muskrats, mallards, stoneys, goldeye and pool are popular pursuits as are participating in rodeo events and living life large.

Education is a priority as is participation in civic government and watching hockey. Some of the best hockey players in the world have come from near Rocky Mountain House and it is fondly remembered by many players as the place where they first scored.
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Let's go to Rocky Mountain House this week-end. We could watch the rodeo, buy a sack of gravel and get our windshield repaired.

So many windshield repair shops! You think there might be a bit too much gravel out that way?
by gnostic1 August 13, 2011

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v. 1) employing ones wiles to rise to the top.

2) upper crust British catering, usually inedible.
1) Lemarette is the new shift manager! I thought I was good at katering but that fluffer must be masterful.

2) Two Earls died of explosive diarrhoea in the Royal enclosure at Ascot last week.

Only two? Sounds like the katering has finally improved.
by gnostic1 April 30, 2011

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

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The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

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