108 definitions by frank klaune

Phrase used in an extremely, utterly exasperating moment when no other execration will do. The phrase is best appreciated with one's temper at full steam, red in the face and at least one hand balled up in a fist, banging on something.
Chris was driving along 53rd, minding his own business when some dumbass in a pickup swerved out of the Convenience Store, blatantly cutting him off. When Chris hit the horn, the dumbass flipped him off. When they got to the intersection, Chris was red in the face and, with one hand banging on the steering wheel, he gestured "the bird" back at the dumbass while yelling, "FUCKIN' SUCK IT!"
by Frank Klaune April 22, 2005

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When a dog (or any animal or even an unruly spouse) has an itchy anus and proceeds to drag it on the ground to soothe the burning anal itch. Typically a dog will sit down, pull the hind legs up in the air and use the frong legs to propel across the floor.
Damn, Frank had the minister and his wife over at their house, and while they were having tea in the living room, Zippy sat right in front of them and did the electric slide. How embarassing!
by Frank Klaune March 29, 2005

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Another common Tomism with humorous implications, "drug monster" refers to a person whose personality is higly changeable through use of drugs. It also refers to one who uses a large quantity of drugs and implies a dependence on such drugs.
Frank took a speedball, two hits off the bong, an LSD cube and a 'lude. Man, he is one drug monster!
by Frank Klaune February 13, 2005

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"Masturbate and ejaculate." Humorous reference to male masturbation (and it's messy aftermath).
Man, no wonder Jimmy took so long in the shithouse. He had to bop the top and drop the slop.
by Frank Klaune May 28, 2004

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A cross between "Geek" and "Gomer" (as in "Gomer Pyle", the bumbling army private from the television series of the same name). The term "geemer" was popularized by A.J. "Vakodak" and was also used as a term for the once famous international tennis star, Guiliermo ("Geemer") Vilas.
"Look at that guy with the pocket protector and the highwater pants. God, what a geemer!"
by Frank Klaune March 05, 2004

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Slang term describing a police officer's baton. The term is best appreciated when the baton is furiously applied on the head of some stupid bastard who desperately deserves it.
We loved it when the dude who ran over the little kid resisted arrest, because it gave the police a good opportunity to use the meat tenderizer.
by Frank Klaune May 01, 2005

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The spash screen placed in the bottom of a urinal to stop spattering pissors from getting ocean spray on their trousers. The Polish fly swatter often is embedded with a urinal cake or scented sustance to enable you to spend many hours of enchanting sniffing in such a delightful environment.
Damn, what the hell? Some sick bastard stuck a Polish fly swatter in my gym bag last night!
by Frank Klaune February 20, 2005

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