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49 definitions by flowersinmidgar2

 
8.
- An elaborate chat room, decorated by mushrooms and retards. -

You know those annoying little girls next door that never stop screaming?

You know those spiky haired blonde boys down the street, whose wealthy WASP parents and, far too busy to monitor how big of a fat bastard asswipe, that their kids are turning into, between SUV trips to soccer practice?

You know that group of screeching sixteen year old's who won't shut the fuck up about Naruto?

You know that jail bait whose profile picture is a conveniently faceless, cropped image of her Punky Brewster quality, early bloomer tits but, has a personality attached to a presence that you'd gladly replace with a starving, feral weasel up your own ass?

You know that Azn kid who screams "Pinoy Powa, Kstyle4lyfe!" and totally pwns nubs with broken English, all the time?
The one who wants to grow up to be a professional video game fighter?
The one who can "cancel" and "exploit" his way, out of nine incoming fireballs but, not his parent's basement?

You know that -begging to be punched in the throat-fucker, in the knit cap, and a short sleeve shirt, over a long sleeve shirt, over a short sleeve shirt, with his bangs covering his eyes in all the pouty, poorly angled, slightly out of focus, poorly lit, cel phone shots of himself in the bathroom, on his barely readable due to a shitty font on top of a shittier background-TKO'ed Myspace?

You know that seventeen year old, who spikes his hair like Goku and runs up and down the street, shooting imaginary Kamehameha's at passing cars?

You know that chode, who will be inevitably ganking lowbies in the starter areas of World of Warcraft a few years from now, with seemingly impossible, diminished grammar?

You know the kids that you'd put aside your possible love of children and/or innocence to crush into a ball of dripping flesh and compressed bone, with your bare hands, if it were physically plausible and legally acceptable?

Well guess what Nancyboy, they're all here! Yeehawww!
And you can't touch 'em!

Did I mention the mods are biased shit bags who favor nexon cash users and their own friends?

Do you like the idea of a poorly controlled game of right and left moving, big headed retards, pressing the three attack buttons endlessly to level up with a system that only rewards the lifeless wasted time of a nation of people who have been known to die playing games for too long?

Do you like the idea of getting "pwned" by a fourteen year old boy, who is simultaneously tapping his super attacks while jamming his dick into the face of his little sister's Barbie doll -whose best and, only material, is "lol n00b phayle u mad"?

Do want to hang out with little kids who just discovered 4chan?

Do you want a message board so bad, that viewing it has, more or less, the same affect as opening the Arc of the Covenant with the sole intent on using it as a makeshift toilet?

Do you like the idea of slaughtering the same poorly drawn monkey and his family repeatedly for a month just for half a level?

Do you have absolutely no other responsibilities or activities with which to "dedicate" yourself to? Would you then be interested in dedicating yourself to a video game? How about a really shitty one?

Enjoy crap?

Then sign up for MS today!
Maple Story is awesome, if you really want to know what Hitler is up to right now.
by FlowersInMidgar2 August 18, 2009
200 65
 
9.
(This commentary is written from the view of someone who technically qualifies as a Hardcore Gamer but, absolutely hates the majority of his peers. If you happen to be an HC gamer, that still manages to NOT look down on all those who don't conform to your style or that you are NOT somehow owed something from your hobby, than this does not apply to you. Not all HCG's are like this. The below is however, how the vocal majority wish to be seen. This is for them, and the bad name they give us all.)

Hardcore Gamer:

A very vocal, arrogant minority of gamers that assume that the gaming industry revolves (or should revolve) around them.

Consider their own skills, and preferences and, those of their peers, to be the only acceptable use of a recreational medium.

Often use the term "True Gamer". An arrogant, idiotic term invented by insecure people to justify their own gaming style.

The irony is, the gaming industry was born from the notion, that these are games, pinball dating back as far as the 40's was designed for people to relax and enjoy.
Pong brought it home, followed by other game systems that were designed for fun and recreation.

However, like all hobbies, there will always be those "stop having fun guys" that ruin it for everyone else.
People who feel that the industry belongs to them.
People who fail to realize that there will always be a place for them but really just want it all. If casual players get their way the whole industry will collapse and the world will end.
People who adopted the medium as their own and decided that they were the only ones worthy.

Refuse to accept that, like board games, video games are made to be enjoyed. They aren't made for you to feel good about yourself. there are hardcore boardgamers out there too and, they also miss the point.

Hardcore gamers are no less ridiculous than a "pin the tail on the donkey" elitist, who shows up to a birthday party with their own pins and blindfold, won't shut up about you're "spinning all wrong" then looks shocked, as to why the rest of the guests find them socially repulsive.

Hardcore gamers are generally cliquish, rude, snide and belligerent.
When they aren't attacking casuals, they're attacking each other for the dumbest shit.

"Yeah you beat that boss but, I did it without using half my abilities, blindfolded, with no healing items, on hardcore extreme killer blood-hell mode!"
Don't sell yourself short kid, you also did it with your head up your ass.

This comes from a culture where sarcasm is way more important than ideas.

To be hardcore, a game pretty much needs to be "difficult".
That's all hardcore games really are. Tedious and long, and dragged out and hard.
Because the life of a hardcore gamer generally isn't very taxing, they can turn to games to "challenge" them.

Often times they'll wax on about how casual gamers are gradually killing the market, while ignoring the fact that the market has always had room for both players and, that some people have a life to kick their ass. That, when they sit down to play a video game, it's not so damn important that a player needs to turn it into some perfectionist job you don't get payed for.

That maybe, a person who doesn't piss 90% of their paycheck on games also deserves to enjoy a game.

Me? I qualify as a hardcore gamer, but I hate the term. I'm ashamed of HC gamers and how awful they make gamers look. How ignorant they are. How arrogant and myopic. How they taunt and belittle people simply for failing to take a fucking game too seriously.

Hardcore gamers want the entire medium of electronic games for themselves. They don't care about anyone else. They're selfish, ignorant tools who want to stay in the basement, never getting laid.

There is a big difference, between wanting a challenge and, demanding everyone should. See past your own god damn skills for once in your lives. Learn to accept that not everyone can sit in front of a monitor for hours mastering a game.
If you need to insult a person's gaming preference, you're the one that needs to stop playing.
Hardcore gamers want games to be hard for the sake of compensating for an empty, easy life. They have nothing else to be proud of so they look to gaming for some shred of pride.
If only they displayed that pride with some manner of grace and civility.
by FlowersInMidgar2 April 17, 2009
167 40
 
10.
If you could take any maturity and/or dignity GameFAQs has, and completely replace it with childish, biased, console flaming douchebags that are somehow too stupid and childish to be members of GameFAQs, which is the third-most stupid website online, (second only to Gamespot which, is second only to Moviecodec.com).
You'd have Gamespot, the stupidest PURE-gaming website you'll ever need, if you ever need a stupid gaming website.

Members spend a great deal of time insulting people for having objective opinions, and liking another console. For Hell's sake, there's a 'Console War' section which, despite the large warnings, are really just asking for flame wars. The members can hardly be expected to maintain control, when talking about unrelated stuff.
When given a forum designed just for "warring" over consoles pops up, you're an idiot to believe, that these morons have the self control to behave.

Another great thing about the members is, they LOVE, LOVE, LOVE to bash GameFAQS. Which, is hilarious, because GF members spend a ton of time doing exactly the same about GS. I can't tell the difference.

The moderators?...whoo hoo! they're bad.
I don't know if CNET just raises these jackholes in some monstrous egg sack fertilized by unprofessional-ism and remedial forum moderation, but man they might be the worst in history.

These people are just like members, complete with the mandatory lack of objectivity, the favoritism toward specific members and all the lame-ass shit, better boards' staff avoid.

STAY AWAY. If you've found that, you've been exposed to Gamespot, immediately flush your eyes with water several times, induce vomiting, lie down...and then shoot yourself in the head. At least then, your last moments will more enjoyable then the time spent on that shitty site.

Gamespot made me want to go to GameFAQs and I believe, at that very moment, all the little children in Hell got out of school for a fun filled, snow day.
Gamespot is called "Gamespot" because it resembles a stain on the internet.
by FlowersInMidgar2 July 31, 2008
146 22
 
11.
1. Sells a "discount card" that simply removes the tax from any purchase and adds a paltry amount to the already undervalued trade-ins.

2. Can't be bothered to produce mock display cases, so they open a new copy and use that.

3. Considers the potential rental(s) of said copies by employees, to not count toward considering the game "used" and proceeds to sell the above mentioned copies "as new".

4. Many employees are so casual they'll stand around talking and playing PSPs while customers wait.

5. Will buy a used game that sold for $59.99 last week, for $12.00 (credit) then, sell it for $55.00.

6. Apply a penalty of -20% for cash trade-ins.

7. Used game prices for new games are only five dollars less than new.

8. Do not take cases, books, maps, other pack-ins into consideration no matter how important, when considering price for used merchandise.
Why shop at Gamestop or EBgames when you can go to eBay or, any other other user-based exchange, and buy or sell games for sensible prices?
by FlowersInMidgar2 August 03, 2008
166 51
 
12.
Message Board filled with a brutal cross-section of the most obnoxious fankids for the video game series Final Fantasy.

Basically, one gigantic circle jerk of arrogance, elitism and anti-social trolling and terrible, biased moderation staff. The usual clique run nerd-board atmosphere dominated by one or two titanic douchebag trolls that the mods refuse to ban, surrounded by his/her sycophantic and considerably less witty/intelligent post riding followers.

Subjects include and are limited to (all threads include the usual trolling and/or petty garbage associated with anti-social nerds drunk on anonymity):
1. Which game in the series was best/worse.
2. Which member should be banned.
3. How awesome the local asshole/hero is.
4. Obligatory/masturbatory, random, unfunny neckbeards showing off thread.
5. Some variation/combination of the above.

To join, members must possess a majority of these virtues:
1. Arrogance
2. Grammar Nazism (note: "roffle, lawls, and other such mind numbing chat speak are considered acceptable, if written by the more popular losers)
3. Pack mentality/Cliquish-Minded (tri-monthly smirf services to the high post counters are mandatory)
4. The complete inability to communicate with anyone on an adult level, in any situation other than an oppressive clique-driven moderator supported group.
English scientists have proved conclusively that prolonged viewing and participation of Final Fantasy Shrine can actively reduce one's ability to produce coherent thought by .5% each minute of exposure and is so malicious that Darfur has considered it for a homepage.
I found Final Fantasy Shrine accidentally, after perusing the nonsense filled bullshit, I had a hard time standing up. I couldn't do math for about a week.
by FlowersInMidgar2 December 28, 2007
168 62
 
13.
People who post empty and meaningless messages, purely to provoke.
Such people are mentally ill and have severe personality issues and insecurity as well as the average mind/priorities of a twelve year old.

Some people just can't grow out of the period in their life when scribbling on the walls and dropping spiders on the girls they liked was acceptable. At 20-30yrs of age, it's just pathetic.

Trolls don't care about proving a point or championing a cause. They just want to annoy, for the sake of annoyance and personal enjoyment, like a baby is entertained by a rattle or colorful lights.
They may tack on a "point" to draw out specific types of people but, it really doesn't matter. They're all the same. They all say the same shit. They all have the same excuses. They all fall back on the same responses and, they all share the same obliviousness to how stupid and pointless their lives are.

The troll is easily amused by things only the most retarded, unfunny child would appreciate.

They celebrate getting a reaction, that's it. Generally, they are so desperate for human interaction and, they are usually so vile, that negative attention is the best they can get. The saddest thing is, anyone can get a reaction by acting like an idiot. Anyone. They honestly take pride in the "art" like they've actually accomplished something.

It's astonishing to watch them brag about something 90% of the world would be embarrassed to even consider.

Don't let the occasional "smart" troll fool you. There is no "art" to it. It's a self loathing tool with anonymity to shield him, doing stupid things and when someone tells them they're making an ass of themselves, they dance around like some great mastermind who manipulated the psyches of those around them through careful planning and psychology, when in reality, they're a retard who shit in the public fountain and laughed when everyone looked.

Trolls have existed since ancient times, when they were referred to as the "village idiot" or "town drunk" a quixotic hero in their own mind, that the rest of the world pities in disgust.

Said disgust, isn't a victory, trolls. You've lost. Pray you never realize it. Ignorance truly is bliss and, you're the happiest motherfuckers around. Go see a shrink and tell them that you find enjoyment in pissing people off and try to look surprised when they tell you, you've got serious mental problems.
Troll this. *finger*
by FlowersInMidgar2 March 03, 2009
300 209
 
14.
Poorly moderated message board for the video game company Atlus.

Members consist of arrogant, childish elitists whose love of relatively obscure niche market Japanese RPGs has created a high school-caliber clique of virginal losers completely oblivious to how bad they make the fans look. Constant trolling and flame wars are the norm. Posts about who should be banned and attacks on people who are -at best- tame by comparison to the popular members are common. 90% of each thread devolves into "random humor" and inside jokes and/or circle jerks. Popularity is based on who you make fun of and reject and, who you accept and never question -both of which, are determined by the high post counters.

Moderators are more concerned with being viewed as "cool" by the small group of attention whoring popular members while enforcing said clique-minded mobbing until no longer personally entertaining.
Atlus.com message boards is THE place to go for gamers who think games should ride solely on unorthodox character designs and limited edition sales.
by FlowersInMidgar2 March 04, 2008
116 27