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11 definitions by emperor kayl

 
1.
The nice way to call someone a complete dick, someone who's being tactless or maybe a tad too truthful. Por ejemplo:
Girl: Wanna go out sometime?

Complete Dick: No. You're hideous. In fact, I'd mistake you for a failed abortion if I didn't know your mom was a pro-lifer.

Girl: You're a complete dick!

Complete Dick's Friend: No, he's just very...outspoken.
by Emperor Kayl April 11, 2008
 
2.
An interesting, seemingly multipurpose chickpea concoction that plays a ubiquitous role in the Adam Sandler film You Don't Mess With The Zohan.
"What is hummus?"

"It's a very tasty, diarrhea-like substance!"
by Emperor Kayl June 12, 2008
 
3.
Morgan Spurlock's excuse to prance about in a patriotically-themed banana hammock.
Actually, Supersize Me was a pretty damn good documentary too.
by Emperor Kayl April 15, 2008
 
4.
Indian savory pastries filled with curry, generally potato curry. Quite possibly the most perfect things ever created by humankind, they are a treat for all occasions and a cure for all ills. Well, except violent gastrointestinal upset due to overconsumption, and we won't do that again now will we? Needless to say, they're radtastic.
Sometimes when I try to imagine what God looks like all I see is a samosa.
by Emperor Kayl April 08, 2008
 
5.
What happens when you think more than you're accustomed to without properly stretching your brain first. Can result in serious brain pain and possibly permanent brain malfunction. Can be caused by overstudying, overthinking, overphilosophizing, and the chronic use of hallucinogens, which can decrease brain function and thus make an accidental sprain more likely.
Person: I've got my calculus class at 7am tomorrow...aauughh....

Friend: Oh yeah, I took that one last semester. I got a sprained brain from it, make sure you stretch before class.

Person: ...how...do you stretch your brain?

Friend: I dunno, but it gives you an interesting visual, doesn't it?
by Emperor Kayl June 11, 2008
 
6.
The awesomest website ever, both for its unparalleled collection of English words and its all-purpose audio pronunciations.
1. I wonder what "agglutinative" means...*click click*...aha! Now I know and shall forever treasure the knowledge.

2. Fun-loving wordophile: Heheheh...hey dude, check this out...

Dude: What is it?

Fun-loving wordophile: Listen...*click* -you- *click* -are- *click* -a- *click* -dick- *click* -wad-

Dude: Holy shit, that's brilliant.

Fun-loving wordophile: I know, I love merriam-webster.com. There's nothing quite like perverting helpful knowledge for the purpose of juvenile diversion!

Dude: Wow. You need to get off there, Mr. Wordy Pants.
by Emperor Kayl June 12, 2008
 
7.
1. A guy in Super Troopers. A big dumb fatass who is really very sad, in a hilarious sort of way.

2. One of those friends who isn't really your friend...he just sort of hangs around you and takes your cheeky shenanigans way too far to be funny anywhere but in Super Troopers.
1. "I don't wanna large Farva. I want a goddamn liter o' cola!"
"Say it! Say Car Ramrod!"
"Pfft. I can say 'meow'...I can say 'moo'. Hell, for 20 bucks, I'll call the guy a chicken fucker!"
"License and registration, CHICKEN FUCKERS! BGAWWWW!!!"

2. Guy #1: Hey, maybe we could TP the prof's house...
Guy #2: No man, we should fuckin' TP his house, then screw his wife, then wrap his children in Ace bandages and dangle them out the windows!
Guy #1: Um, no, that wouldn't be funny.
Guy #2: Fuck yeah it would! I'm gonna go!
*runs off alone*
Guy #1: He is such a Farva.
by Emperor Kayl April 14, 2008