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12 definitions by dwarven

 
1.
The lowest form of gaming that's still considered gaming.

Call of duty is literally the same game with a new map every single year. Don't believe me? Call of duty 3's crash screen reads and I quote "call of duty 2 has crashed"

The fanbase was originally alright but then children with parents who don't give a shit ruined it for everyone, forever.

If you play call of duty and nothing else you are essentially the scum of the gaming community.

If you believe call of duty is better then any game out there, not every, any of the other games out there then you are lower then the scum

The entire series is now being milked dry by greedy developers and is honestly not worth playing in any way shape or form in it's current state.
Scum: Call of duty is the shit, everything else sucks :P
Real gamer: Dude, call of duty has sucked since game 3
Scum: NO FUCK YOU FAG CALL OF DUTY IS THE SHIT WHAT DO YOU PLAY PORTAL?
real gamer: Yeah because portal is actually fun and actually a game.
Scum: IT SUCKS MY DICK LIKE YOUR WHORE MOM
Real gamer: *Blocked*
by Dwarven August 08, 2012
 
2.
The long delayed sequel to Duke nukem 3D. It was lost in development for over 12 years but when it finally came out it essentially killed the Duke Nukem franchise.

It seems very unlikely that anyone other then hardcore Duke Nukem fans will take much pleasure in this mess of a game and even then only for the nostalgia value of it.

It almost feels like Gearbox, the game company that obtained the rights and "finished" the game, went back threw out all 12 years of previous work and slapped together a 2-bit halo knockoff to rip off the old fanbase and ruin Duke for the new fanbase.

Featuring filler content, platforming puzzles, and crappy game mechanics this is truly a complete mess. It also crossed the very big line between dirty humor and stupid humor more times then I can count. Between the rape jokes and the shit throw (i kid you not it's really in there) it's just not worth the time to play, not to mention the load times are awful even on a high end gaming PC.

They somehow managed to make it to sexist even for Duke, even for DUKE. I didn't even know that was possible.

Another Duke Nukem game has been announced by gearbox, hopefully it will be a masterpiece that saves the franchise but after this god awful performance it's doubtful
Duke and gamer on Duke nukem forever

Duke: Well after 12 fuckin years it better be good.

Gamer: It sucked

Duke: What the fuck did they do wrong?

Gamer: lean over here
*whispers*

Duke: ... fuck the aliens Gearbox unless you do it right this time I'm comin' for you
by Dwarven September 19, 2012
 
3.
The people who constantly try to ban a book, videogame, movie, ect. for not being morally "clean"

These are the kind of people who make the ridiculous (and false) claim that video games are bad, harry potter encourages satanism, and that a nipslip causes permanent damage to anyone who sees it.

Some of them are nothing but trolls who feed of the resulting media coverage.

Most however actually believe there own insane ideas are correct for example fundamentalists and Allen quist

The appropriate response to these people varies based on situation but most of the time it is one of two things either laugh at them or get angry (but only irritated angry not beat down angry) and point out exactly why they are incorrect.

Normally they have impossibly high standards (religion)
or they have found an axe crazy reason to believe something is corrupting there children.
Moral guardians: Down with video games they cause violence suicide and more violence

Normal person: Actually violence per 1000 citizens peaked back in 1982 before doom the first major violent video game was released. For that matter violence has drop by half since then starting directly after violent games started coming into the media.

Moral guardians: Nah, uh our great leader Jack Thompson told us video games is evil.

Normal person: then your a dumbass.
by Dwarven August 28, 2012
 
4.
Frank West the main character of Dead rising. After years of working for newspapers Ex-photographer Frank West decided to go freelance and cover topics most journalists wouldn't even consider including riots, wars, and a myriad of other topics.

In addition Frank West fought his way through the first (official) zombie out break inside of the Willamette mall in Colorado after the city was quarantined, discovered the culprit behind the outbreak, killed numerous insane mall goers who'd succumbed to the stress of a zombie outbreak and became a world famous celebrity.

Unknown to the public until late in his fame Frank West was infected by the zombies during his time in the mall and became dependent on the drug zombrex which temporarily prevents the zombification process and if taken every 24hours can keep an infected person alive indefinitely.

During the events of Dead Rising 2: off the record (alternate but equal version of DR 2) Frank is seen fallen from glory and now a disgraced former celebrity playing on the game show Terror is reality (a gore fest centered around slaughtering zombies) to make money to keep himself in zombrex. Frank isn't a man who can be kept down however and went on to discover the truth behind phenotrans the sole producer of zombrex, Terror is reality, and the numerous outbreaks since the Willamette mall incident including the events at Fortune City where both Dead Rising 2's take place.
Can of zombie whoop ass

First three ingredients:
Frank West
Orange Juice and
Dress Code Deviance
by Dwarven August 02, 2012
 
5.
The absolute scum of all online communities.

Griefers are all the sadistic weirdos who can't seem to relax and enjoy life.

They spend most of there time delighting in violence, destruction, and pointless harassment all of which can be repaired by a moderator in under 30 seconds.

The only places where griefing is allowed or encouraged is backwater minecraft servers run by griefers to get there needless sadism out on each other.

The majority of griefers cry themselves to sleep at night knowing they are wasting the time doing nothing to nobody but themselves and that every trace of there rampages is erased in seconds and all memory of them forgotten.
Log-in: Griefer
Griefer :TTROOOLLLOLLLOLL XD I am teh hackzz!
Mod: >:(
Griefer: lol stupid mods are stupid Imma break your house :P :P :P :P
Mod: -.- are you really that stupid?
Griefer: Your house is on fire azzhole beter plt it out. Can i haz diamonds plox plox plox?
Mod: /ban Griefer
Log-out: Griefer
Mod: /rollback blocks Griefer 1D
Server: all damage repaired

Griefer: *cuts self and cries*
by Dwarven July 24, 2012
 
6.
A digital download system based on auto-updates, friends-lists, and no DRM.

Although not perfect it's a much better option then Gamestop and dealing with the asshole customers rip off resales, cheap ass trade in values that rip you off at every possible opportunity.

Steam was created by valve to sell there products along with indie products and occasionally other stuff. Many people claim that Steam is only around to line valves pockets but really they are just upset by the bugs and mistakes valve made with the program rather then having really issues with it.

Despite it's wonderful usage and application Steam has it's fair share of faults. Mainly slow processing which can delay downloads massively, auto-updates without any notification, and the occasional bugs and glitches.

Despite this Steam is often regarded as a massively useful program and a god send because of it's lack of pointless DRM which most other digital download services are plagued with. It also has often sales which can give a great product away at a great price.
Guy: Steam sucks it's so laggy and never loads an-OH that indie game is on sale for 50% off must buy!

Gabe: Another job well done :D
by Dwarven September 08, 2012
 
7.
A Japanese indie game focused around running the kind of item shop present in the majority of RPG games.

The plot focuses on a young girl named Recette Lemongrass who's father suddenly decided to become an adventurer and went off to fight a dragon on top of a volcano... yeah not the best parenting.

Not long after his disappearence a loan shark fairy named tear shows up to start collection on an outstanding debt from Recette's father. Recette being unable to pay the debt believes she will have to forfeit the house so Tear strikes her a deal. They convert the first floor of her house into an item shop which has regular payments for the debt cut from it's profits.

As far as gameplay goes this is a unique and interesting experience mixing a haggling system and item crafting with some RPG dungeon areas which the player can loot for goods to sell with the help of adventurers. Available in English on steam this 2006 game is rapidly gaining popularity and has been reviewed by a few reasonable large names on youtube including Jesse Cox and is well worth the time it takes to play.
Guy: Recettear is a cool game have you tried it

COD N00b: Is it part of call of duty or halo?

Guy: No it's an RPG and shop game abo-

COD N00b: It's not call of duty or halo so it sucks

Guy: But-

COD N00b: NO, everyone knows call of duty and halo are the pinical of gaming and the only good videogames ever made forever.

Guy:... your a douchebag n00b
by Dwarven September 08, 2012