a person who pulls sketchy moves while drunk, including but not limited to stealing things from bars, flirting with a hottie while your significant other is at the other end of the bar, or periodically disappearing to the bathroom to make out.
"Jorge was a total sketchoholic last night- did you notice how he kept disappearing with that girl?!"
Typical Everyday Dude. A TED is commonly seen wearing a striped shirt, or worse yet, a popped collar. TEDs try to hit on women at bars but have absolutely nothing interesting to say, and they usually roll in a crew with 3 to 5 other TEDs. TEDs can be sighted at Dave Matthews Band concerts, the driving range, or frat boy bars.
"Ew, did you see that TED trying to hit on me? I could've had better conversation with a dead cat. And at least the dead cat would not have been wearing a braided belt and double popped collar."