(n.) when a bro cleans his room solely because he thinks he might be getting laid that night.
Guy 1- "Yo, dude, you trying to play Call of Duty?"
Guy 2- "Nah man, I gotta get my room cleaned up."
Guy 1- "You gay dude?"
Guy 2- "Bro, Cindy might be in town tonight!"
Guy 1- "Ah, a little fling cleaning, I see. Well, carry on!"
Guy 1- "Dude, class just ended, why are you still sitting there?"
Guy 2- "Well, I've been staring at Chelsea's tits all class, and I'm still rocking some serious timber!"
(n.) the study of all things smurf
; Donnie Darko
is considered by most experts to have been the pioneer of this field.
Smurfology, as expounded by Mr. D. Darko:
Donnie Darko- “Smurfette doesn't fuck.”
Sean Smith- “That's bullshit. Smurfette fucks all the other Smurfs. Why do you think Papa Smurf made her? Because all the other Smurfs were getting too horny.”
Ronald Fisher- “No, no, no, not Vanity. I heard he was a homosexual.”
Sean Smith- “Okay, then, you know what? She fucks them and Vanity watches. Okay?”
Ronald Fisher- “What about Papa Smurf? I mean, he must get in on all the action.”
Sean Smith- “Yeah, what he does, he films the gangbang, and he beats off to the tape.”
Donnie Darko- “First of all, Papa Smurf didn't create Smurfette. Gargamel did. She was sent in as Gargamel's evil spy with the intention of destroying the Smurf village. But the overwhelming goodness of the Smurf way of life transformed her. And as for the whole gangbang scenario, it just couldn't happen. Smurfs are asexual. They don't even have reproductive organs under those little, white pants. It's just so illogical, you know, about being a Smurf. You know, what's the point of living if you don't have a dick?”
Ronald Fisher- “Dammit, Donnie. Why you gotta get all smart on us?”
(n.) the ability to recall "old" internet memes
Guy 1- "You ever drink Bailey's from a shoe?"
Guy 2- "Piss off Old Gregg!"
Guy 1- "Nice meme-ory, dude. Most kids these days haven't seen that shit."
(adj.) a rare state in which one retains, or even achieves, transcendent hotness while simultaneously looking filthy; possibly coined to describe Ke$ha
Guy 1- "That Ke$ha girl, damn she's so dirty!"
Guy 2- "I know man, she's such a skank! I bet she's got tons of STDs"
Guy 1- "Well, I mean, yes, possibly, but I really meant that she's just unclean, like she needs to take a shower. I think she's straight up dumpster hot."
(n.) a recently-given hickey
; coined for its distinct raw, meaty look.
Guy 1- "Nice hamburger, broseph."
Guy 2- "Yeah. She was real hongry!"
(n.) any unusually difficult workout for a sport; often the coach's only means of palliation to his or her team is to provide pizza afterward.
Coach- "Get some good sleep tonight, boys. You'll need it for tomorrow."
Guy 1- "Oh shit, looks like Coach is planning a pizza party for us."
Guy 2- "Fuck a duck man, I can't run any more laps!"