107 definitions by d. gould

Masterbating, with your non-dominant hand. Much like a "friendly stranger", it supposedly gives one the feeling of being tugged by another person.
"If you're right-handed, why don't you jerk off with your right hand?"

"Because if you switch hit, it makes you cum faster."
by D. Gould June 08, 2006

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An "ass pirate", of the first order. Often observed dancing to disco, wearing leather chaps, and a Muir cap.
"Hey Fun Boy...Velcome to zee funhaus!"
by D. Gould June 26, 2006

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What you need to do when you get "wood", from looking at a hot chick.
"Uh oh. Someone call a lumberjack. 'Cause I got WOOD!"
by D. Gould February 05, 2006

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In retail, a customer who feels they are absolved, for whatever reason, from paying the full retail, or even sale price, of an item. They are ruthlessly aggressive, cutthroat, and Grade-A social bottomfeeders, of the lowest order. Often they will use every lie or excuse in the book, in order to garnish themselves a deal. They will claim a product is damaged, when it is not. They will claim to be family of staff, when they are not. Females will attempt to use sexual charm, while males prefer verbal aggression, to try and break down a salesperson. Easily spotted. Often found standing in the middle of the store, yelling at the top of their lungs, and making an ass of themselves.
"If that 'professional bargainer' makes a purchase from you, make sure you hit him up with the hidden 'PAIN IN MY ASS' tax. He has it coming to him!"
by D. Gould January 12, 2006

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A phrase used to describe the extreme innocence and purity of a person's true character. Whether it be obvious, or latent.
"Bitch was acting like a cock tease at the club. But when I got her back to my pad, she totally chickened out. She was all cake, ice cream and pony rides."
by D. Gould January 24, 2006

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Much like a "limp cock and no lube" would equate to no action in bed, this phrase describes a state of utter uselessness. Or, a situation in which nothing of value is currently transpiring.
"There's no beer and no chicks. This party's a limp cock and no lube."
by D. Gould January 24, 2006

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Injecting drugs into your bloodstream. Usually done by only the most hardcore addicts, as it results in the quickest high.
"I know this junkie that got HIV, from tapping a vein."
by D. Gould February 14, 2006

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