14 definitions by cmoney55

Top Definition
A slang term for a girl who has such an out of control muff it looks like shag carpeting.
1. "I went down on this chick last night and she had such a shaggy beaver I'm still pulling pubes out of my braces."

2. "Once I had sex with this chick who's shaggy beaver made her vagina look like it was wearing a pubic burka."
by cmoney55 September 06, 2011
When a baseball player hits a foul ball that goes behind him and into the bleachers.
1. That was a Chinese homerun, it went the "Wong" way.

2. I'm not actually Asian, my eyes are swollen because I was sitting behind home plate last night and got hit in the face by a Chinese homerun.
by cmoney55 September 14, 2011
The way by which a man measures his level of fitness. If his body mass becomes too large he will not be able to see his penis in which case he is overweight; however, if he is able to look down and see his penis, everything is good.
Situation 1:
Wife: "You are putting on too much weight."

Husband:(Looks down and sees Penis) "Nope I'm good, my penis to mass ratio is normal."

Situation 2:
Doctor: You need to lose some weight if you want to stay healthy"

Patient: "I thought so to, but I got a boner this morning and my penis to mass ratio seems fine."

Doctor: "What?"
by cmoney55 September 09, 2011
A standard system of measurement for determining if a girls booty is in the correct size range. This is done by placing the tips of your thumbs together and pointing your pinkies straight out to determine if a females butt fits within that size range. This system of measurement can be misleading if you have been drinking and your calipers become more flexible leading to a morning of shame and self-loathing.
Situation 1:
Justin: "I was drinking too much last night and my butt calipers caused me to bring home a heffer."

Chris: "That's unfortunate, you should probably chalk this one up to a slump buster"

Situation 2:
Samer: "I saw this girl at the club last night and was so excited when she fit perfectly within my butt calipers. Unfortunately it turns out she was like sixty years old!"

Nick: "You still had sex with her didn't you?"

Samer: "You're focusing on all the wrong details."
by cmoney55 September 09, 2011
Another term for labias, such as vagina lips.
1. "Her jeans were so tight they exposed her beaver nuggets."

2. "I acted like Moses and parted the beaver nuggets last night."

3. (Talking to Lindsay Lohan) "Your beaver nuggets look like beef tartar"
by cmoney55 September 09, 2011
A veil of pubic hair protecting the identity of ones vagina
1. Her pubic burka prevented me from noticing she had herpes.

2. I did not know she was muslim until I took off her pants and saw her pubic burka.
by cmoney55 September 08, 2011
A word for describing when a woman's pants are pulled up so tight you can see her beef curtains. This has the resemblance of tracks left by a wagon wheel. Observing said event can be enjoyable yet leads to penis frustration since it makes you want to have sex with her. The term is synonymous with camel toe.
1. "Her wagon ruts made my dick want to travel the oregon trail."

2. "I'm no Stephen Hawking but her wagon ruts are sooo deep her vagina might be a black hole."

3. "The fabric of her pants created wagon ruts as it tried to traverse her cavernous poon."
by cmoney55 September 18, 2011

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