3 definitions by candyfloss

Top Definition
A female otherwise known as a non fuck. Outstanding impersonaters of a still dead rock or road kill. Lies in starfish position and lets them HAVE IT!! Doesnt know anything outside of missionary. Usually has no or very little personality. They exist in many forms. Can vary from very simple to the disturbingly complex. Some looking for love in all the wrong places,like to fuck anything even though they cant fuck. Village bicycle or town slut you know the one-everydody has a story about her to to share!!! (-usually the same story). Others are often disguised in the "oh so cool" suck cock t-shirts (or our personal fav "tell your boyfriend to stop staring"-scoring one million on the lame-o-metre). Look for all boy activities-theyll be a-lurking,did somone say rotary nationals? nine times out of ten,you wont fucka starfish more than once either cause she gave you an std (cant pee without screaming for a week) or you dont want to be able to relate to dirty rapist(cause thats the magic of how the starfish makes you feel)
guy one "hada total dud fuck last night,"
guy two "ya mean she didnt even move?"
guy one "yea a full blown starfish fuck-"
guy two 'think I had her last week!"
by candyfloss June 23, 2007
A male who cant perform in bed properly or should i say at all. no foreplay no rubbing or touching of any kind. just sticks his cock in there and has a few quick thrusts and "sorry girls" its all over with a grunt. like a farmer herding cattle or ploughing crops, in and out with no effort and the bare minimum of work..seems to be either young males that are too damm stupid to know any better or older males that have complex issues about females. Sad though because most farmer fucks actually think they are really good in bed and act like "players" to their friends. leaves girls very unsatisfied and frustrated and most times straight into the arms of a "Non Farmer Fuck" thus leading to more emotional scars for the poor farmer who will never learn any better.

Unfortunatley you cant determine a farmer untill after you have shagged them.

A male version of a "starfish fuck"
Girl1 "oh man!! i had the worst shag last night"

Girl2 "whys that?"

Girl1 "He didnt do anything, and i mean anything!! and it lasted not even minute"

Girl2 "oh no!!you had a farmer fuck"
by candyfloss June 23, 2007
a relatively unknown non celebrity who is involved in music (although not many people know or care for it)and seems to think they are in legendary status and behave like they are a rockstar. Live in fantasy land inside their own head, population: 1.
changing ones first name to "vegas", then going on stage during a gig in a v small town and announcing the new name to the crowd of 5, is a beautiful example of a rocktard..
by candyfloss June 25, 2007
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