3 definitions by bortschuss

Top Definition
Slang term for a member of the LDS faith. Refers to the vision of Nephi in Nephi Book 1 Chapter 8. Can be combined with "Joey" to make "pole-touchin' Joeys."
"Here, have some of my homebrew."
"No thanks."
"Why, are you a pole-toucher or something?"

"Mom, can I watch an R-rated movie?"
"No honey. Now run along to church with the rest of us pole-touchin' Joeys."
by bortschuss April 24, 2007
permutation of 'lelis ghetto rig'
1. to mangle, molest, wreck, or half-assedly put something together
2. one who mangles, molests, wrecks, or half-assedly puts something together
3. the act of mangling, molesting, wrecking or half-assedly putting something together
Guy 1: (inadvertently kicks over a coffee table with drinks on it)
Guy 2: Dude, you totally ligged my living room!

Guy 1: (walks into a room with glasses held together by duct-tape and staples, one lens is made of saran wrap)
Guy 2: Nice lig job, fucker.

Guy 1: (attempts to change the batteries in a remote control, ends up breaking it into pieces and somehow getting them all sticky)
Guy 2: You're such a fucking lig!
by bortschuss April 22, 2006
Slang term for a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, derived from the name of their prophet, Joseph Smith. See also, "pole-toucher".
"I'll have a whiskey double."
"Sorry, I can't serve that to you."
"Why not?"
"Because this is Utah, and the Joeys won't let me."

"Hey, do you want to go into that great and spacious building with me?"
"Sorry, dude, I'm totally a Joey."

"Excuse me sir, but why is your hand on that rod?"
"Because I'm a Joey."
by bortschuss April 24, 2007

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