boy 1: did you see Megan Fox in that bikini on that show last night?
boy 2: yeah, i was gonna tug me Johnson but i'd already indulged in several sessions of self-pleasuring and couldn't make him salute, all i ended up doing was mourning a dead one (proceeds to cry over memories)
When, despite all protest from the owner, a wilting Johnson is inserted with no enthusiasm into the pink velvet sausage wallet of a partner/wife/bit on the side
man: sorry love, ive had 4 in the last hour, not a chance you're getting any tonight
woman: you're joking?! its been ages since we've done it and im getting it whether you like it or not!
man: but i cant even get it up!
woman: tough shit, its happening even if it means you are burying a dead one