58 definitions by benny b from the bronx

determining where you drank last night by examining your collection of matchbooks and credit card receipts; also known as following the caper trail.
Bruce Lee: What in God's name are you looking for?
Jose Contreras: Just doing some pocket forensics. I was allegedly quite boisterous last night but I don't recall being in public.
by benny b from the bronx August 17, 2007

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A person (usually male) with alarming proficiency in all things jizz-related. Since this insult will usually be interpreted as considerably homophobic, you may want to avoid using it in the vicinity of furious flamingos. I find it to be more effective as an adjective, which also conveniently takes some emphasis off of the ever-so taboo gay bashing aspect. A perfect example of a jizzwizard candidate would be one of your poor (aka not rich) friends resorting to acting as a beer queer in order to satisfy his alcoholism. The act itself is not what deserves the ridicule, but the pathetic nature of his financial status. If we've learned anything from the wise Patrick Bateman, it's that poor people require considerable derision. (I hope people take that last tangent seriously.)
Jose Contreras: You cock worshipping jizzwizard! Stop touching my radio!
Bruce Lee: (stares a hole into Contreras' skull) Wow, homophobes are awesome.
Jose Contreras: ...I'm sorry, you can have my radio?
by benny b from the bronx August 16, 2007

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In poker, to make a loose play with the intent of looking like a loose player, thus inducing extra action from your opponents later.
Jose Contreras: Wow, I'm calling that motherfucker from now on, he's playing with garbage.
Bruce Lee: He's just advertising you dumb fuck, Johnny is usually tigher than a mouse.
by benny b from the bronx February 21, 2005

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Straight draw in which only one card will complete your hand, a.k.a. an inside straight draw. For example, you complete a belly buster straight when an eight is dealt to complete a 7-8-9-10-J straight.
Jose Contreras: He went all-in with a belly buster and got fucked in the ass.
Bruce Lee: He lost money?
Jose Contreras: 200,000 bucks
by benny b from the bronx February 21, 2005

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A drunk who is shy until last call, at which point he'll try to hook up with anything that has a pulse and/or booze at home.
Bruce Lee: Damn, that quiet motherfucker is suddenly talking to all the transients, that is disgusting.
Jose Contreras: He's just a last call Lothario, typical bullshit.
by benny b from the bronx August 17, 2007

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n. a reformed 12 stepper; the thirteenth step is forgetting the previous twelve steps
Jose Contreras: Hey! I thought you said Brian stopped drinking, he's chugging that bottle of whiskey!
Bruce Lee: I guess he's a 13 stepper now...
by benny b from the bronx May 10, 2006

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1.
performed when a girl, especially a bitch, is sucking on your balls; the man, or receiver of the nut-sucking, proceeds to smack the bitch across the face quite hard. But, it is a failed o-ring if the cock smackage does not cause the bitch's, or the balls sucker's, ears to ring. The most effective o-rings will knock a bitch out cold.
2.
to perform an o-ring.
1.
Bruce Lee: That chick jessica keeps giving me shit about her being pregnant but i didnt even stick it in the bitch!
Jose Contreras: Sounds like she could use an o-ring... knock that bitch out and she won't come back to complain to you anymore.
2.
Jose Contreras: Man, I o-ringed that bitch so hard last night she was out for an hour!
Bruce Lee: Thats nothing, ese. I once hospitalized a bitch I o-ringed her so hard.
by benny b from the bronx November 10, 2004

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