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1 definition by axle rose's mansion

 
1.
The standard populators of small town America. Red necks usually live in double wide trailers 1-5 miles outside city limits, typically on a dirt road. Red necks never go to real colleges (a few will push their way through the local community college to get degrees in automotive technology or welding but they cringe their teeth and dread every minute of it). Instead Rednecks tend to get manual blue collar jobs straight out of high school and continue to live with their parents for many years after graduation (assuming that they graduate. Most don't). Rednecks' lives revolve around cars, they talk about cars all day long every day and every time you try to change the subject they bring it back to cars. They hate anything new or foreign made and only like old beat up 1970s american clunkers with half the roof rusted off and the other half of the paint chipped right off, the kind of cars you have to warm up in the summer time. These cars are their pride and joy and they spend 50 percent of their pay checks every month on picking up "new" parts from the junk yard to fix this or that (the other 50 percent goes to budweiser and Kentucky deluxe "whiskey"). Rednecks love to buy old clunkers with no engine from the local junkyard and letting them sit on their lawn. They usually brag that these cars COULD be nice someday. Rednecks are trapped in the small towns they were born in and never leave, although most will brag night and day that next week they're moving to Los Angeles or New York City. Rednecks are extremely crude and have no concept of social pragmatism. Total strangers will try to brag to you about how big their wang is and try to force you to tell them how big you are. Rednecks continue to live in 17th century and usually father ten children with different women of various ages between 15 and 40. Rednecks will usually call you at midnight on a weeknight just to brag about a new part they got out of a junkyard to improve their old clunker.

Rednecks are scared shitless of large cities. They claim that there's way too much traffic, prices are too high, too much crime, too many liberals, people are too rude etc and tend to go on vacation to places way out in the middle of nowehere (obscure lakes, the woods, etc).

Redneck societies are usually split equally between two equally dreadful subsocieties:
1)The christian conservatives: typically a severely overweight husband and wife who go to church three times a week and constantly try to strong arm you into coming. Hard core baptists who take every chance they can to tell you you're going to hell unless you sign on the dotted line saying "Yes I ___ accept Jesus as my personal savior".

2)The drunks: unemployed slobs with ten children from different women who wander the dirt roads of town because they can't afford to buy gas for their old clunker cars. Beg random strangers for change to buy beer or whiskey.
Rednecks are such a drag. Thank God they're all confined to the small towns of America and never venture out to our Large cities.
by axle rose's mansion September 11, 2009