the smallest of small towns populated largely by old lady boutiques and antique shops. Houses more than its fair share of WASPs who have ridiculously large amounts of income. Subsequently, such rare species as the home mom reside in majority in its fair limits. Night life reaches its peak point at 8 o'clock culminating in a steamy starbucks lounge. On occasion, the less braindead of its inhabitants will wonder just why such a pointless town is in existence, although it is quite awesome for the more hard-core partiers who can max out at eat 'n park.
woman: sweetie, if you haven't thought of any other great ideas for our honeymoon, I was thinking we could go to sewickley!
man: what are you on? i'm not so sure i want to marry you anymore *backs away slowly*