A bloodthirsty Highlander who has the urge to make bloodier than usual historical films. Showed his true colors with the addition of some ethanol. He has this fascination with seeing red human blood spurt out of cut arteries and veins rhythmically with the heartbeat. He's a Catholic.
Mel Gibson has a good chance of starring in the next Cannibal Holocaust movie and he gets to be the person who does ritual sacrifices on film. Oops, they did something like that, see apocalypto
Braveheart:Blood-painted swords, blood dripping down his face.
Apocalypto:Cutting a father's throat in front of his son, removing human hearts.
Passion of the Christ:Whipping Jesus, nailing him to the plus sign (he's drizzled like a cinnamon bun with blood).
The Patriot:People getting shot and stabbed with bayonets.
A very realistic CGI 3D model of an Arabic looking man in a turban with a salt-and-pepper beard who appears on U.S. propaganda against Islam. Exists only in the mind of George W. Bush.
If Osama's real, then why don't we see him or hear him?
1. When the Big Bang occured according to a Unix computer system. This date is when the first Unix computer was made operable. If you find a file that was from Wed Dec 31, 1969 on your Linux PC, you can be sure that the date on that file got knackered.
2. A date to utter when something hasn't been done in a long time, referring to the idea that January 1, 1970 is the "beginning of time". Used when something seems like it hasn't been done since the beginning of time.
1. On January 1, 1970 Unix was running on a mainframe computer.
2. Romeo:Man, you stink! When was the last time you showered?
Joliet:I took a shower on January 1, 1970.
2. The last time the gas station changed the coffee in the coffeepot on January 1, 1970.
Describing of a person of unfathomably great laziness. Looks for every opportunity to get out of work. Even trivial chores are too much of a finger lift for them. So called because they will get into their car, turn the key, adjust the mirrors, put on their seatbelt, and drive to the mailbox that is at the end of their driveway.
My neighbor is so lazy he drives to the mailbox. It is .07 miles away.
A movie that reinforces the point that Mel Gibson is a nut who craves human blood. Features include a baby getting dashed against the ground till its neck breaks, a man's father getting his throat cut by the ruthless savages quite audibly (you can hear the cartilage) in front of him while visible spurts of blood run down his shirtless chest, a native person coated in mud, and the sacrifices, three sacrifices I could count watching it in fast-forward mode. The victims are rubbed down with a blue paint, then slaughtered. That's three realistic looking human hearts exposed to daylight and drenched in gorgeous crimson blood. It's too bad the native doesn't take a huge bite out of the cardiac muscle--but you can't win 'em all. At least twice the head is chopped off (kinda hard to see) and it's quite visible that the Homo Sapien head is thrown down the pyramid staircase and caught in a basket. The headless corpse is then thrown down the stairs later.
That throat cutting scene in apocalypto is the most realistic gashing of the human neck you will see outside of Al-Quaeda.
The ratings philistines probably denied Mel Gibson an extra scene in apocalypto where someone eats the flesh off a living human using a knife so that the last thing the victim saw as he died was his own kind eating his raw muscle tissue.
Apocalypto's sacrifice mode suffers from the Hide Your Children trope. The aztecs, Incans, and Mayans all sacrificed young children occasionally before the tribes were conquered.
1. A horror movie about children that come from corn kernels that kill people.
2. The Amish
1. Let's go watch Children of the Corn Urban Harvest!
2. These people are not right...they're like...children of the corn or something!
Going to school against your will has the equivalent life-shortening effect of smoking 94,254 cigarettes. 8 hours a day times 180 days a year times 60 minutes divided by 11 minutes lost per cigarette. This calculation doesn't take into account homework, so the number of cigarettes would be even higher.
One valuable thing I learned from school is to never have children so they won't have to go through what I did.