After anal, shove an apple up her/his asshole, then proceed to use your rod for deeper insertion. Have her/him deficate the apple on to a serving platter. Slice apple and serve with plenty of the remaining feces.
Boyfriend: Do you know what today is honey?
Girlfriend: Yea, Tuesday!
Boyfriend: Tuesday! You know what that means?
Girlfriend: I sure do sweetheart!
Both together: It's Washington Crapple Night!