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5 definitions by TripleCatzWar

 
1.
A post modern, post oil train that is basically a cross between a big city subway (e.g. metro) and an old school trolly. When serviced by a competent organization, this type of train has the potential to beat the living shit out of global warming and peak oil.

In America, however, when mismanaged by your typical urban state government, a light rail system quickly becomes a broken down version of the world's smallest joke amongst the increasing proportion of working folk who can't afford $4/gallon gasoline.

The Baltimore light rail is a vital link of the area's public transit system, yet it just makes the city look more ghetto while it does very little to reduce traffic on interstates 83 and 97. Furthermore, it fails to convince the youth of Glen Burnie and Cockeysville that pimped out Civics and low riders are not the wave of our global ecological future.
by TripleCatzWar May 21, 2008
 
2.
A neighborhood in Baltimore that has not yet been fully invaded by gentrification. It is, in fact, the only neighborhood immediately adjacent to downtown that has yet to be colonized, for the current social dynamics gaurantee that this neighborhood shall remain real.

The Pigtown that is the "Washington Village" marketed by the city and it's redevelopment contractors has grabbed a foothold in the "Barre Circle" and "Camden Crossing" blocks that are upscale, occupied by grad students and working professionals, and convenient to Washington via I-95 and the MARC Train.

The rest of Pigtown consists of mixed races and mixed fortunes, with no hate between these social layers, as they all simply strive to go to work as best as the #36 bus and the old factory and scrap yard networks make it possible in the Neitherworld of Southwest Baltimore, one of the last strongholds of the American Blue Collar culture!
I live in Pigtown because I can easily hop onto 95, and easily hop onto the MARC Train when my car is in the shop. These small time DC contracts are great, and I pay discounted rent like you wouldn't believe, but that low rent shows it reason when I walk southwest down Washington Boulevard to get a beer and get hassled by that guy who needs only fify more cents to catch the #36 or Light Rail, or only twenty-five more cents to grab their own beer!
by TripleCatzWar November 14, 2011
 
3.
Underrated, fast yet somewhat creepy, this subway can also be called "The Illuminati Express" (after it's prison car style interior design and the symbolism that embellishes the Johns Hopkins Hospital Terminal Station) or "The Silver Rabbit" (as opposed to the MTA-Maryland's companion "White Snail," or light rail, which is slow yet somewhat charming).

As opposed to the previous definition, the Baltimore Metro goes places, just not very many places. Specifically, it gives car-free locals access to shopping at the Owings Mills Mall, but only if they are willing to wait a half hour for the bus or walk fifteen minutes around (oh the irony) an abandoned parking lot embellished by signs that promise a walkable, transit friendly community.

For those more edgy lovers of shopping and ladies of the Mondawmin Pixy kind, the metro goes directly to an urban mall.
For lovers of still more edgy thrills, this train also goes directly to the (in)"famous" Lexington Market (where one can transfer, if the are willing to walk two blocks in the elements, to the infamous White Snail, giving them access to yet more B-more spots).

The Baltimore Metro is supposedly going to go more places in the future, including Morgan State and White Marsh. However, that will only happen once (1) The recession and related state funding crisis ends and (2) Baltimore's young professional colonists stop viewing the great historic city as just another car entitled suburb of DC.
My boy's into all dat crazy occult bullshit, so he's riding the Baltimore Metro to the end of the line to study all dem pyramids and stars they gots at Hopkins. Me ... all I wants is a piece of fried chicken, a 'nick and a freaky 'ho, so I be gettin' off at Lexington Market yo!
by TripleCatzWar December 29, 2009
 
4.
The ultimate cocktease for the unwillingly confused, by our sick American Society, heterosexual male college aged romantic. That is, a young, bored and flirtatious trophy wife who posts a semi-fake ad to an internet dating site and proceeds to act like she's falling in love with him so that she can have the most authentically scandalous phone sex behind her husband's back.

Also related, a hyper-romantic female who goes beyond all of society's standards to be free, only to get trapped in a stagnant office job where she becomes that slutty professional who is obviously enjoying the insurance broker, hedge fund manager, congressman and county judge in all different holes.

Man, you just see that porno pixy blow by in that Benz! Shit, I bet her husband is paying good money for her dildo and broadband access as he loots the wealth of American society through collateralized debt. After all, a hottie needs her wand and spells in order to make any would be male sucker co-ed believe he is her soulmate.
by TripleCatzWar May 21, 2008
 
5.
The ultimate cocktease for the unwillingly confused, by our sick American Society, heterosexual male college aged romantic. That is, a young, bored and flirtatious trophy wife who posts a semi-fake ad to an internet dating site and proceeds to act like she's falling in love with him so that she can have the most authentically scandalous phone sex behind her husband's back.

Also related, a hyper-romantic female who goes beyond all of society's standards to be free, only to get trapped in a stagnant office job where she becomes that slutty professional who is obviously enjoying the insurance broker, hedge fund manager, congressman and county judge in all different holes.

Man, you just see that porno pixy blow by in that Benz! Shit, I bet her husband is paying good money for her dildo and broadband access as he loots the wealth of American society through collateralized debt. After all, a hottie needs her wand and spells in order to make any would be male sucker co-ed believe he is her soulmate.
by TripleCatzWar May 25, 2008