Used in the same vein as many other popular, yet freakishly anti-social, yet endearing sex-acts one performs on their signifigant other, (ie: Dirty Sanchez, Plumsucker, Abe Lincoln, et al,) The VON SCHMOOT is so increadibly atavistic and vile, that its meaning defies definition.
Instead, is is used as a catch-all phrase to describe the most perverted and rotten act that your girlfriend
will permit you to perform on her (willing or otherwise),yet still make you breakfast the next morning.
That chick is so freaky, instead of the "rick james", I gave her a "von schmoot". Next time I'll invite her sister too, and give 'em both a double "von schmoot".