Though commonly misconceived as the anal canal through which gerbils at times migrate, a la Richard Gere (that region is better termed "gerbils' boulevard of broken dreams"), rats' alley is a horse of another color. Rats' alley is, in point of fact, not only the anal canal, but also the oral, vaginal, optical, nasal, auditory, wound-ary, navel, penile, areolar, carpal, and phallangular canals through which rats at times not only migrate but defecate upon.
"Did you see all the rats in Julia Roberts' rats' alley last night? She looked like that girl from Indiana Jones!"
1. What happens just after you jerk off into a fan and just before cum splashes onto your roommate's face as he awakens to a beautiful day. 2. When, much like the leaves in "Colors of the Wind" from Pocahontas, John Smith's wolf-shaped cum carries on a gentle autumn breeze before navigating via heat-seeking sperm into Pocahontas' cumhole (be it her mouth, vagina, or anus, through which Brother Muskrat, seeking to escape Pocahontas' body, squeezed his body through until the anus began to close, keeping him from being able to get his tail out with its hair intact). 3. A shart.
"Some speculate that U2's 'Beautiful Day' is, in fact, about the time John Smith, traveling into the modern day via time warp, launched a damp gust into Bono's sharting anus."
-Rolling Stone Magazine