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19 definitions by The Afterworld Cafe

 
1.
noun: A spinner who holds so tightly to the man that's fucking her that when he gets up on all fours, she no longer touches the bed.
Ally is a real clinger. Last night when I was fucking her, she wrapped herself around me so tight that I got up, got a beer and changed the TV channel without losing rhythm.
by The Afterworld Cafe July 03, 2005
 
2.
A phrase used to express lack of understanding when everything should be perfectly clear.

A way of saying "I should understand this completely, but it makes no sense whatsoever."

Origin: In the 1980s ski comedy "Hot Dog: The Movie," the antagonist proposes a Chinese downhill to resolve all conflicts between himself (the hotshot skier) and the protagonist (not so talented skier/cool guy). After they outline what's at stake -the girl, rule over the slopes, cash, etc. -the comic-relief Chinese guy leans in and asks "Wha te fuck is a Chinese downhir?" (A Chinese downhill is a ski race with a shotgun start -first one to the bottom wins.)
Journalists talking about a story that's been assigned, but the second journalist missed the meeting:

J1 -"Good luck getting Pee Wee Herman to discuss his movie theater fetish. You better get on it; deadline is Friday."

J2 -"Pee Wee Herman about what? When did this happen? What the fuck is a Chinese downhill?"
by The Afterworld Cafe June 04, 2007
 
3.
A butt so beautiful it inspires thoughts of rough, doggy-style sex.

A really nice ass that one wishes to look at during sex.
Person 1: "You see the pants Lisa's wearing today?"
Person 2: "I always knew she had an ass made for a face full of pillow, but now there's no arguing the subject."
by The Afterworld Cafe June 04, 2007
 
4.
Noun: To arbitrarily spray semen on another person after receiving oral sex.

A money shot.
Jeff: "Sarah blew me this morning and I sprayed cum all over her tits and face."
Jerry: (In distinct southern drawl) "Daaaamn Jeffrey, gave her the Bill Clinton"
by The Afterworld Cafe June 07, 2007
 
5.
n. -one who does not have the mental capacity to properly and safely navigate a public road.

Some one who drives like a retard.

Someone suffering from Roadtardation
During summer, Cape Cod is beset upon by roadtards. Driving becomes an exercise in futility and stress.
by The Afterworld Cafe October 10, 2007
 
6.
noun: The state or condition of inadvertently revealing ass crack whenever one sits or bends over.
The girl in front of me in economics has mad plumber's disease. All I see the entire hour is her enormous ass crack.
by The Afterworld Cafe July 03, 2005
 
7.
The state or condition of having something up your ass. Most often used in reference to the location of a stupid person's head.

Origins: The term "defilade" is used in military tactics to refer to a position where natural surroundings protect units, vehicles or equipment from enemy fire.
Sgt. Slaughter: "Private Pile might be the stupidest person in this company. His head is so far in rectal defilade that he can see his own teeth."
by The Afterworld Cafe June 23, 2009