38 definitions by The Colonel

Wilbur Kookmeyer, a popular cartoon character from Surfer Magazine. He is the epitome of a kook - can't surf worth a shit and is a complete friendless loser (except for his dog, although you get the impression that his dog thinks he's a kook, too), but loves surfing and thinks of himself as a pro-caliber ripper. Hated by all other surfers and constantly humiliating himself and behaving like, well...a kook.
Huntington Beach is full of kookmeyers, especially all those 30-something dipshits who act like locals but can't really surf worth a shit.
by The Colonel May 11, 2004

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the act of going to another country and telling them how to make their ethnic food
Hey Slim, people in mexico have no idea how to make a chalupa, so I used some culinary colonialism to show them where to put the baja sauce.
by The Colonel December 02, 2003

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Stands for "defecation condition" - a play off of the government acronym for "defense condition". Refers to the varying, and usually scaling, levels of severity relating to an impending bowel movement. The direction of the sliding scale varies from user to user, but typical usage labels Defcon 1 as the least urgent, and Defcon 5 as an imminent expulsion (the opposite of the defense department's usage).
Dude, I was at Defcon 5 and nearly shit my pants. Luckily we drove by a Carl's Jr. and I was able to drop a load.
by The Colonel July 18, 2003

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A baseball hit on the ground that takes an unexpected, usually sharp bounce upwards.

While any unexpected movement can be considered a bad hop - off to the side or even some unusual spin on the ball - most bad hops "leap up" suddenly just before reaching the player attempting to field it.

The negative ("bad") nature of the term refers to its difficulty to catch (inherent in catching a ball is successfully being able to predict the ball's exact path or trajectory).

Not only are balls which take a bad hop hard to catch, they are often dangerous and can hit a player in the face or upper body.

Bad hops can be caused by dry or wet spots on the grass or dirt, small rocks or weed clumps, or even tiny imperfections or divits on the surface of the ground.
It looked like a routine play, but the ball took a bad hop off the edge of the grass and hit the shortshop in the eye.
by The Colonel October 13, 2007

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A trick ass ho wif dem crooked teef and dat longass face. dayum.
"Get ova here ya horse faced bitch...and s my d".
by The Colonel November 03, 2005

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A complete loser.
Dude, that guy's a full on doad.
by The Colonel July 18, 2003

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AKA Gynecological Porn. Pornography that focuses on the woman's vagina. This can range from poses where the woman is simply spreading her legs in every image, to extreme closups of, and practically inside, the vagina.
This chick is spreading her pussy lips in every picture. It's full on Gyneconography.
by The Colonel February 27, 2007

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