(n) To reduce or minimize testosterone-driven stress, tension, or frustration—sexual or otherwise—through any means necessary, including but not limited to masturbation, anal penetration with inanimate objects, or extended sessions of Call of Duty play.

(n) When a fat chick’s Facebook profile and albums contain nothing but photos of her and her skinny hot friend, leading prospective suitors to believe that she is in fact, the skinny hot friend. When approaching similar situations, one should note that statistically, 11 times out of 10, the profile belongs to the fat ugly chick. No self-respecting hot chick would ever risk confusion by including her fat friend in ANY of her Facebook photos, despite the latest ‘Tagging’ technologies.

(v) The act of slapping a vagina with a whip or belt. Duh.

(n) An act of oral sex preformed on a standing male who then wipes his penis dry on the unsuspecting orator's shoulders, from left to right.

(n) A five-finger finger banging where the fingers do not form a fist but instead point forward meeting at the tips to form what appears to be a finch’s beak.

(n) An area, usually a room or garage, created by a man specifically for that man where he and his bro’s can escape and be themselves without judgment—like a man cave without the masturbation station.

(n) A four-finger finger banging with sharpened or untrimmed nails.