The cramp you get in your leg after sitting on the Bog for too long reading New Scientist, Viz or an "Art pamphlet" for longer than it took to drop yer guts
Dave: James was limping after he got up of that seat, looks like a case of "Bog Leg" to me
Dave2: Yea, that article of the Koenigsegg in Top Gear Magazine must have been 3 pages
Female nipples that when licked by a man still remain soft an flacid.
James: I met this bird last night at the pub, got her back to mine and I was trying for hours to give her hard nipples
Nick: ah, she must have had lesbian nipples
A Toilet: because of echo made when you involuntarily fart while in the sitting position.
Nick: Jeez, that curry was a hot one last night, I think I'm gonna go play some tunes on the Arse Amplifier
James: Don't sit there too long, you may get a dose of Bog Leg
A toilet brush
Nick: Someone had a good curry last night, they've managed to give the back of the bog a good coat of pebble-dash
James: Yea, I'll run the bog whisk over it
When your shit sits in the pan, but there is 3 times more below the waterline than above, producing the same effect as an iceberg.
I used Nicks bog the other night and he hadn't flushed, he left a Chocolate Iceberg that would have been worrying to the captain of any ship
Jon (sniffing): Did you Drop your shopping?
James: Ah, yea, that was me, I'm back on meat
The streaks left on the bottom of the bog after shitting then flushing, and thus leaving numerous parallel lines of differing widths.
That Tescos sausage was tasty but it left the "Bog Barcode" on its way out