A character from old irish folk lore, this young man would attack small children in their sleep and scare them with his slurred drunken speech.
"Ahh its Spainy!"
ailment caused by extreme infatuation with a certain blonde. symptoms include being welsh, a twin, or growth of eyebrows. there is no cure as such but a way to stave off the craving is to drug the object of your obsession and have your way with her.
There is also another minor form commonly experienced by 14 year olds, although less direct it does require much stalking to fix.
"Look at that elcoholic"
"Elcoholism is a crime"
The definition of an Arsenal player, the only reason that Arsenal managed to go undefeated this season. Notice Pires diving for a penalty against Portsmouth to draw. Note also that Arsenal have two decent english footballers, Henry is a clear homo-sexual, Keown is possibly the ugliest monkey ever, Pires has yet to clean the stain off his chin.
P.S. they will never make it past the quarter-finals of the champion's league unlike a certain other London club.
"You fuckin dick Pires, if you don't stop diving i'm going to run on the pitch and cut off your legs, and then will have fun beating you with them as you role around on the floor in real pain for once"