17 definitions by Sneaky Snyde

Top Definition
Wonderful old expression for a large, bronze cash register. It has many keys on the front. When you press a key, it "rings up" the amount you pressed, and it rings a bell. You have to press several keys to "ring up" a large amount of money. Each of these rings is beautiful music to any merchant.

When you finish the "song," the Jewish Piano opens and you can put in all that wonderful money you just collected.
Asher, we've got a paying customer. Would you please escort him to the Jewish Piano and play a sonata?
by Sneaky Snyde May 27, 2005
An automotive transmission created for people missing an arm or a leg.

An automotive transmission for people who do NOT know how to drive.

An automatic transmission is like training wheels on a bike. When you learn how to ride a bike, you lose the training wheels. When you learn how to drive a car, you take the automatic rental back and get a REAL car with a stick shift.
Damn, Hector, that kid Smedley had the nerve to drive over to take my daughter out in a car with an automatic transmission! Can you believe it? I chased his ass away and told him not to come back until he learns how to drive.

Don't blame you, Simon. Say, maybe your daughter can teach him how to drive a stick shift like a real man.

Great idea, Hector! She likes the kid but won't go out with a wimp to save her life!
by Sneaky Snyde May 27, 2005
An Arab. An A-Rab. A person from Saudi Arabia, Syria, Iraq, Egypt, Yemen, or Lybia.
Walking up and down the streets of Damascus, I saw several thousand camel jockeys.
by Sneaky Snyde June 01, 2005
A hammer, a screwdriver, and a pair of pliers.
Elmo Luke gots two thirds of a Okie tool kit. He done lost his pliers.
by Sneaky Snyde April 30, 2005
1. Topics for discussion or debate.

2. Euphemism for "problems" used by women and effeminate men. These people want to appear to be too polite to say
"problems," so they say "issues."
Joe: "I have issues."
Schmoe: "You have ISSUES?! What are you, some kind of girly man? Women have issues. Men have PROBLEMS."
Joe: "Oh, you're such an issuephobe!"
by Sneaky Snyde June 07, 2005
To walk with delicate, deliberate, feminine steps, often with exagerated, delicate hand gestures.

The distinct gait of the poof, as bait for trawling for other pouves.
Realy Ernie, if you want to play on the Raiders, you can't mince around like that!
by Sneaky Snyde June 01, 2005
A doofus who can't even drive a stick shift, but who goes to great expense trying to make his car LOOK fast without increasing it's performance. All show and no blow!
Look at that silly Honda with the big exhaust pipe and the wing! The jackass ricer thinks it's cool, but it has an automatic transmission! What a pantywaist!
by Sneaky Snyde May 26, 2005

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