Social rejects who hang around in groups of 10-50.
Males often seen wearing dirty, worn out rockport boots, burberry socks with luminous green adidas tracksuit bottoms tucked into them, a burbery cap and a nike hoodie over the top (with the hood being worn up), coated with a can of lynx. the hair is gelled into a solid quiff, normally dyed blonde.
Females vary between two types. Type one: the tramp.
The tramp wears similar clothes to the male, if not the same, except topped off with a "great value!" gold necklace from elizabeth duke at argos, often with a clown pendant. 4-16 gold creoles will also be worn in the ears, and a large tacky belly-button piercing is necessary. Type two, the tart wears the same jewelerry except adds 60 grams of orange, blue and pink make up, a pair of tight jeans with "babe" or "angel" written on the ass (only £3 from the local market) and a t-shirt with a similar phrase on it. This is topped off with a pink or baby blue caridigan with "EST 1980" or "TEAM" written across the front in huge white letters. The hair is pulled back into an abnormally tight bun which pulls their skin so much that they cant move their face, other than to chew some stolen wrigleys extra from the local corner shop (oh no sick man).
The music can vary from dance, to pop, to rnb and hip-hop eg Sean Paul, Mis-teeq, Beyonce Knowles, 50 Cent etc. Anyone who does not listen to this music is instantly labelled as a "freak". Same goes for the clothes.
To find a townie, I suggest you look in the following places: bus shelters, mcdonalds, park benches, phone boxes, outside corner shops, and anywhere is the general area of a rough council housing estate.
Communicaing with townies is often difficult considering the fake jamaican accents and unnecessary amounts of slang. Here are a few common phrases to get you started:
Fock ya mom - I have a pinner.
Mo' fockin cuzzen'll fockin batta ya - I would fight you but my 600 grams of hair gel havent dried yet.
Nah man stink - You've offended me.
Sick (pronounced sick-AH) - Word used to describe something of townie approval.
They often have nicknames such as:
You can witness these on various lampposts and bus shelters throught Great Britain.
Townie: Oooom ya fockin lookin' at mate!!! *spits*
Innocent passer-by: I wasn't.
Townie: OH NO! Stink!
Innocent passer-by: 0o'
The female equivalent of duck butter
Man that girl had such nasty snatch cheese, once I undid her pants I passed out.
Portable, sometimes fixed, radar speed devices put up either by police or private agencies in an attempt to frighten you into reducing your speed. Often these lack any sort of camera, and rely on flashing lights and short messages to slow down if you're exceeding the speed while approaching them. However if it contains no camera, or you live in an area where photo radar enforcement is illegal, it affords an interesting opportunity to see how fast you can go and rack up points in miles per hour.
Everyone slowed down but John kept his foot on the gas, he got a 78 on the Mobile Scoreboard.
The act of surprising an unsuspecting enemy by preparing your erect, throbbing pride moments before charging them and unleashing a fiery blast of your revenge against their cranium. It is not required to leap from, say, a balcony in a theater to elude capture but is extremely recommended as the contact splatter of your man juice is guaranteed to illicit a strong primitive response.
From the lowest of low to the Commander-in-Cheif, no man is safe from getting Booth'd.