4 definitions by Reginauld Hooterschmee

Top Definition
The single most pleasing word in existence. Wumph has no definition, it is merely synonymous with feeling like a big fluffy warm pie when one mutters it to ones self or a worthy audience.
WUMPH!!! *proclaimed as if it were the answer to a riddle one has pondered for many a year*
by Reginauld Hooterschmee November 11, 2006
A scented paper used to arouse your wife after sustained periods of sexual drought. Word is often spoken of an ancient Majolical which was used in the great wife wetting incident of 1675, 53 wives en mass were exposed to a Majolical so pungent their vaginas convulsed and enveloped a small portion of Cunt, over the centuries this region became pronounced "Kent" and the name changed to suit. It is here that the tradition of underwear was first started to prevent Majolical related land destruction occuring again. Also a form of arm wrestling confined to pubs named "The crusty trousers".
"Fetch the Majolical my wife is dry as a cream cracker"

"Let the Majolical begin! the loser shalt have their penis hit a'ponst by thine shoe"
by Reginauld Hooterschmee November 22, 2006
A subject who has the brain capacity of a half eaten pot noodle, yet persists in considering themself to be the most intelligent being in existence.
Khan of the Iron Maiden Online Fan Club is a Croyp.
by Reginauld Hooterschmee August 14, 2006
To be constantly engaged in the act of cat hoovering.
Also the standard EU maximum weight guideline for lifts.
This short article from a Reading (UK) newspaper decribes such an event

'Ed was soon arrested when the police were informed by a neighbour of strange sounds described to be "Identical to the time her uncle hoovered up the cat" the lady ate a peanut then digressed "Aye, i knew that sound straight away.....cats being vacuumed has a distinct tone to it"

Questions were asked as to how he sourced a constant supply of cats, the local police seargent suggested "he might have been giving birth to them every morning after drinking the off milk found in the fridge" traces of mohair were found in the suspects rear.

Later that evening Smewing was said to have actually made the Cheshire cat extinct after causing a lift to collapse on his way to the police station, crushing it beyond recognition.'
by reginauld hooterschmee January 22, 2007

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