13 definitions by One Stark Reality

Father's Day in the ghetto.

LBJ's "War on Poverty" was a $5,000,000,000,000.00 boondoggle that destroys black families to this very day.

Maury: "In our seemingly endless series on mass confusion, Boomsheeka 'Miss Thang' Chickenheader is about to find out the results of her 87th paternity test."

Boomsheeka: "This is gonna be the one Maury; I am sure this time. D'tronne is definitely the father."

Maury: (thinking to himself that he needs to get a REAL job) "D'tronne... is NOT the father!"

Boomsheeka: "Aiiiyeeeee!" (runs backsatge and slides down wall)

by One Stark Reality May 17, 2008
A combination of "boobs" and "tunnel vision" that hinders men from looking a well endowed woman in the face.

One group of women find this very irritating and assign all sorts of presumed motives to the man in question (especially if they're lesbians): "he's objectifying me", "I have a brain", "he doesn't take me seriously", "what a jerk", "stop gawking", etc. In protest, these women often remark "stop talking to my tits" or wear tight t-shirts (with an upward pointing arrow) that says "Hey! I'm up here." Whether the presumptions about these men are actually true depends on the man in question.

A second group of women understand that having a natural C cup, or larger, bust line (without being fat), is a blessing. (34 D is ideal of course). To these women, if the man with booblevision is a nice, decent, responsible guy, with a sense of humor (and could be introduced to their parents) then they are flattered to some degree. They know that this guy has an appreciation for their beauty in the same way that he appreciates: a Key West sunset, a polished red Ferrari, an otter playing in the wild, a perfectly thrown football, or even the Blue Angels executing an aerial fleur de lis.

A third group is not the least bit offended, because they are getting what they want. They use boobnosis and whatever "charm" they possess to try and overcome whatever they're lacking in physical attractiveness. In order to avoid the probability of contracting a myriad of STDs, some men will limit their sexual contact with this group to titty sex (use your imagination). These women are the diametric opposite of the first group.

And lastly, members of the Itty Bitty Titty Committee have rarely, if ever, personally experienced booblevision and so, ironically, may yearn to be occasionally objectified or gawked at. This attitude is the bane of feminism.
Roderick: "Yo Reggie, check out dat foo Leroy. He bees gotsin' da booblevision again."

Reggie: "Man, dat dude ain't no playa. He don't even wait 'till da ho' turn her head away to be peepin' at dem titties."

by One Stark Reality April 11, 2008
A male-oriented restaurant where the servers' bodacious, natural cleavage is never on the menu--but always in voluminous supply. Daisy Dukes in various forms (denim, khaki, Lycra) function to round out the servers' assets.

Openly admiring these women is an unspoken, but completely sanctioned, activity by all parties involved: owners, managers, servers, and patrons.

(With apologies to Yoda), "The force of booblevision is strong yes?"

Breastaurants are in a class by themselves. They are certainly above the mainstream in terms of atmosphere, but will never be considered fine dining by pretentious elitists who value "ambiance" (pronounced OM-bee-ahnse) over ample portions of, well... everything.

Breastaurant atmosphere is both fun and titillating. It gives new meaning to the phrase: "Let's head to the mountains!" Likewise, the food is a carnivore's delight.

As such, breastaurants send out a vibe that wards off feminists, vegans, and queer men in a TWO block radius.

See also: brestaurant, breastraunt.
>>>>>

The Metroplex area really has it going on when it comes to breastaurant selection.

Between Twin Peaks, Bone Daddy's and Hooters, one can keep abreast of some of the finest female forms that America has to offer world humanity. Breastaurants should be declared "UNESCO World Heritage" sites.

UNESCO DELEGATE: "I agree! Twins, twins everywhere, it's a bodacious breastacular!

In my country of Crapistan the waitresses all wear BURQAS for Pete's sake! Oy vey."
by One Stark Reality May 26, 2009
A form of visual "hypnosis" used to make people think, at first glance and hopefully longer, that you are more attractive than you actually are through the use of:

-a great abundance of beautiful hair (either long, "big", or both).

The goal is to divert attention from one's plain or unattractive face, or unattractive body. This purposeful deception falls between "accentuating the positives" of one's appearance and actually undergoing cosmetic surgery or liposuction.

When Meredith thinks that her powers of hairnosis are fading, she goes to a salon and spends 150 dollars for a "recharge." However, once guys take a long, second look, the hairnosis is dispelled and they are not duped by the subterfuge.

by One Stark Reality April 11, 2008
A form of visual "hypnosis" used to make people think, at first glance and hopefully longer, that you are more attractive than you actually are through the use of long, shapely legs coupled with:

- short skirts
- short shorts (aka Daisy Dukes)
- high heels
- eye-catching stockings, tights or pantyhose.

The goal is to divert attention from one's plain or unattractive face, or otherwise unattractive body. This purposeful deception falls between "accentuating the positives" of one's appearance and actually undergoing cosmetic surgery or liposuction.
"Those Coco Loco skanks always show up on weekends and use legnosis to try and attract guys. However, once the guys take a long, second look, the legnosis is dispelled and they are not duped by the subterfuge. Pudgy or ditzy, with too much make-up, I hope those skanks don't become skankasaurus-rexes."
by One Stark Reality April 11, 2008
A form of visual "hypnosis" used to make people think, at first glance and hopefully longer, that you are more attractive than you actually are through the use of:

- a thong bikini bottom or g-string
- thong panties
- thong straps that conspicuously protrude from the waistline of a pair of jeans.

The goal is to divert attention from one's plain or unattractive face, or otherwise unattractive body. This purposeful deception falls between "accentuating the positives" of one's appearance and actually undergoing cosmetic surgery or liposuction.

This technique is more "equal opportunity" than boobnosis or legnosis (which are so DNA dependent) because of the woman's willingness to bare her butt in public. This carries a lot of weight with men.

The butt in question can actually be somewhat flat, large, or even slightly flabby, but these negative characteristics may be somewhat discounted as long as it is uncovered. A very attractive butt, of course, greatly enhances the overall thongnosis effect.

"There were three chicks at the pool party using thongnosis to try and attract guys. However, once they took a long, second look, the thongnosis was dispelled and they were not duped by the subterfuge. I hope those chicks don't become future cougars."
by One Stark Reality April 11, 2008
A combination of "boobs" and "tunnel vision" that hinders men from looking a well endowed woman in the face.

see: booblevision for the comprehensive definition

Roderick: "Yo Reggie, check out dat foo Leroy. He bees gotsin' da booble vision again."

Reggie: "Man, dat dude ain't no playa. He don't even wait 'till da ho' turn her head away to be peepin' at dem titties."
by One Stark Reality April 12, 2008

Free Daily Email

Type your email address below to get our free Urban Word of the Day every morning!

Emails are sent from daily@urbandictionary.com. We'll never spam you.

×