Cornelius: a name typically stereotyped or given definition by persons not named
Cornelius; who have never
met a Cornelius; or who are jealous they are not a Cornelius. A Cornelius and his corresponding lifestyle can be used to profound and lasting effect, as no one ever forgets meeting or sharing
a memory with
a Cornelius. A Cornelius’ magnetic, effervescent and fearless persona is generally
a product of having survived a lifetime of name abuse at the hands
of blandly named
, high-fiving d-bags named
Mike, Phil, Steve
and/or Rob. Cornelius’ generally
enjoy expectations because
disappoint. Little can also
be done to stop a Cornelius once he starts talking, drinking, smoking, fighting, yelling and schmoozing, and rest
assured, if you’ve made
to back to Cornelius’ home after
having met one, you’ve already made
up your mind to make him breakfast.
Tiffany: So, I met this
guy last night and the only way I could get him to shut
up was to sleep with him.
Gisel: Was his name Cornelius?