1a: A Belgian socialist, of any variety, taken to the mass theft of bicycles
Belgian 1: Oh no, somebody stole my bike!
Belgian 2: Mine's been stolen as well!
Cop: Sorry, boys, a maiden's virus has been on the loose in Brussels. We think he might be a member of the Belgian Workers Party.
Belgian 1: Do you know what the maiden's virus looks like?
Cop: All we know is that he is part of a metal band and is apparently a midget taken to homosexual acts.
Belgian 2: If we don't stop this maiden's virus, everybody in Belgium will be without a bicycle!