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31 definitions by Kofi

 
15.
(British): woman working either as an escort, at the higher end of the sex industry, or as a sex worker, prostitute, at its bottom end.
"Don't you dare call ME a callgirl, you asshole .... I DON'T do this just for the money, you know!"
by kofi May 14, 2003
 
16.
(Everything Umbongo says is 80% true and 100% funny, but he could have added:) RAG WEEK is traditionally a part of the British university calendar. It is a fund-raising week for the poor and disadvantaged (not themselves), where students try to palm off funny writings, and (say) push toilets along the main street of town, swallow ugly-looking fluids, or try to set up new Guinness records for bedhopping, for fun and public cash. Errrr, but apart from that usual stuff, they give some of the resulting money to local or larger charitable organisations, such as the SLC (Student Loans Company).
A: So what are you doing for Rag Week?
B: I think I'll just stay in bed.
A: Have you got sponsorship for that?
B: No, but I have got a whoppin hangover.
by kofi May 15, 2003
 
17.
much the same as a bearded clam: except perhaps more eager, and more neatly trimmed, i.e. furry rather than shaggy in its coat. A plain beaver but helplessly spreadeagled. An object of fear, revulsion or contempt for some, an object of desire, conquest or reverence for many: yes it's yet another name for her cunt!
She was 16 when she first discovered she was carrying a wild animal around with her. Before she knew where she was, a wily trapper had trussed up and made short work of her furry little companion. Nowadays she keeps her split beaver as contented, well-exercised and well-fed as she possibly can.
by kofi May 14, 2003
 
18.
(derived from ice cream's standard basic flavour): humorous term for the enjoyment of "straightforward" sexual intercourse, most obviously in the routine missionary position. If the phrase is used, the implication is normally that the enjoyment is somewhat limited, when perhaps other "flavours" might have been welcomed .... (Note: See also "chocolate and vanilla")
A: "So, how's the new girlfriend?"
B: "Oh, all right."
A: "What's the problem?"
B: "She's only interested in plain vanilla."
A: "Hell, man, give her time. You didn't expect a blowjob on the first date, did you?!"
by kofi June 30, 2003
 
19.
1) (sex): to wanka man so that he ejaculates (alternatives: jerk off, jack off)
2) (soccer): to substitute a player, i.e remove him from the game.
Warning: Be very careful not to confuse the two. (See example.)
The new teenage arrival at Man United was discussing terms with his agent, and was impressed. Agent: Look lad, you'll only earn about 30 grand the first year. Kid: 30 grand? brilliant! At Rochdale, I only got a couple of quid a week! Agent: And they'll be starting you off with just a basic Mercedes. Kid: Mercedes? Brilliant! At Rochdale, I had to get the bus! Agent: And you'll have to accept last pick of the groupies. Kid: Groupies? Brilliant! At Rochdale, I had to sleep with my sister! Agent: Oh, and for the first few games, Sir Alex may want to pull you off at half time. Kid: Pull me off? Fantastic! At Rochdale, we only got a slice of orange and a cup of tea! ......
by kofi May 14, 2003
 
20.
form of dance music originating in Afrika (Cameroun, to be precise). Noted for its repeated bright-toned picked-guitar figures, chanting-style vocals (often in Douala) and sometimes brass accompaniment, makossa is very upbeat. Sam Fan Thomas is perhaps its biggest name internationally. For better or worse, makossa has become a staple ingredient of "world music".
Have you heard "Samba Makossa" by Chico Science? A new blend of hip Afrikan and cool Brazilian grooves!
by kofi May 16, 2003
 
21.
woman who is completely addicted to the most prominent male organ. Same as nymph, nympho, nymphomaniac.(Note that "whore" in this context does not usually indicate any payment is made: it simply suggests utter, often gullible submission to the servicing of males, which breeds contempt in others.)
Tray used to be Miss Cock Whore for a few years, but now she's a bit more selective about who can have her.
by kofi May 12, 2003