41 definitions by John Wesley

An intellectually superior human who poots a lot. Follower of the teachings of Pootism. A devout pootist is referred to by their inner circle as a Pootist Monk.
Mike was a great Pootist and wise in the ways of Pootism.
by John Wesley February 09, 2008
artistic expression used to describe the latest flood of cookie cutter songs from every current-era female pop musician. Recognizable by the usual accompaniment of pianos or violins, these are the songs that are inducing the collective menstrual cycles of the radio free world. Although usually reserved for female musicians, the term can, in some instances, be applied to the critique of male musicians if the estrogen level is deemed beyond the “Seminal Trappings” term assigned to the same music.
Female: Recently, while watching VH1, I found myself really enjoying the Vaginal Moanings of Sara Bareilles and Taylor Swift.
Male: Recently, while watching VH1, I found myself really enjoying the Vaginal Moanings of James Blunt.
by John Wesley February 06, 2008
Someone of considerable self-worth that is only important in their own insignificant world. Suffering from severe delusions of grandeur, they think the world will end abruptly when they cease to exist.
King Joe: "I am such a professional, this organization should be really honored to be benfitting from my knowledge and expertise."
Observer: "what a king joe"
by John Wesley February 12, 2008
Ambulance driver. Usually characterized by their NREMT patch and window decal. Can also be spotted easily "off duty" (wal-mart, sonic, dollar general) wearing parts of their on-duty clothes and overtly apparent pager.
It took 2 crews of cot jockeys to load their fat ass in that ambulance.
by John Wesley February 09, 2008
RTFQ(squared). Testing instructions to Read The Fucking Question Twice.
If you're not sure about it, RTFQ2
by John Wesley March 05, 2008
Pile of shit left for you to step on in your yard by a Dachsund.
Son of a bitch, thats a fresh german steamer I nearly stepped in.
by John Wesley February 09, 2008
The condition of two (or possibly more) straight girls who make out for the hell of it. When alcohol is involved it may also be referred to as Bar Bisexual.
When the monkey force gets together, there is sure to be at least one instance of recreational lesbianism.
by John Wesley February 09, 2008

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