1 - Looks like a burnt down forest, black stubs surrounding your every move.
2 - Could be mistaken for a chia pet
3 - The equivalent of a dinasaur bush thats never been touched.
I decided to move down my former girlfriends (Kate) undies and felt a hairy beaver tail. Quickly retracted my hand from those surroundings and proceeded to break up with her the following day. .... YES it was THAT bad.