A ballerina from Belgium with a speech impediment who really likes to do splits.
Van Damme hasn't made a good movie yet, though, he keeps trying, which is great because now we get to celebrate his mediocrity with him --how original.
I've actually heard he's a pretty nice guy which makes little difference to most Americans because they have no fuckin' clue where Belgium actually is located on a map since Geography and History are both taught as one subject in school.
Person 1: Did you see the last Jean Claude Van Damme movie?
Person2: Please tell me it will be his last --ever.
Person1: He didn't make any promises.
Person2: Oh my god, help me! I've been Van Dammed!