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2 definitions by Jake ARE

 
1.
The new, true religion. It kicks ass, thats the truth. Established in 2007, followers of it must follow 6 commandments:
1, thou shalt kick thy others AREse
2, thou shalt be of thy epic
3, thou shalt never be an activist, vegetarian, bitch, or dipshit
4, thou shalt help cause Global Warming
5, thou shalt convert others, on pain of death
6, thou shalt remain epic
6b, thou shalt deliver lawl and poon statemeants.

Convert now, save your souless husk of a body.
Pope de Dope: WEED!
The Armazingzollarz Prophet: You pothead.
The High Holy Priestzorz of Booze: Yeah. You are.
Epic Master of Lawling: We all are. Convert now (to AREIzzim) or die bastiche.
by Jake ARE March 16, 2007
 
2.
Verb

To utterly own something, someone. The point of no return, a level up from pwn.

Past Tense: Poon'd
Future Tense: I will poon

The chain of ownage:
Poon > Pwn > Own
Person1: Hey man whats up?
Person2: You fucking faggot get the fuck out and die.
Person1: Insecure much?
Person2: ...
Person1: Poon'd!
by Jake ARE March 16, 2007