5 definitions by Jace Jaxon

Top Definition
An ejaculatory expression of fluid from a penis (spunk, cum) that occurs as a result of sexual intercourse. However, this projection of ejaculate must occur outside of the body, with no further physical influence or assistance other than said intercourse.

To be clear, upon approaching climax, the male will remove his penis from the orifice he is penetrating at the crucial moment, and proceed to ejaculate without any physical assistance to his penis this creating a handsfree cumshot. This, is referred to as a fuckshot.
Fratboy 1: "So you came without her even jacking your cock off for the big finish?"

Fratboy 2: "Yep, just popped my cock out of her and blurted a nice heavy fuckshot all over her stomach. It's the only way to go!"
by Jace Jaxon August 10, 2009

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A straight queen is primarily a straight man who has many affectations, mannerisms and tendancies that are stereotypically accustomed to a homosexual. Straight queens are often known to be suspectly gay-friendly, and even have beyond questionable relationships with homosexual men. Many straight queens are accused of being closetted homosexuals or at the very least of having latent homosexuality.

A secondary definition of a straight queen is; a straight acting homosexual/bisexual who believes themselves to be straight simply because they are dellusional or lack the capacity to understand that if they have frequent sexual contact with other males and like it, this makes them gay or bisexual.

Finally, a straight queen can simply be a vocally camp hetrosexual male, which leads to them often being mistaken as a gay.
Example 1;

Person 1: That guy is so gay

Person 2: Nah, he's just a straight queen

Person 1: But he felt my ass, and he's wearing make up

Example 2;

Person 1: That guy fucked me

Person 2: No fucking way, he's such a homophobe!

Person 1: He's such a fucking straight queen...trust me, he fucked me

Example 3;

Person 1: Oh my God did you hear that guy talk? He's ubergay.

Person 2: Nah, he's got a girlfriend...he just sounds a bit...you know...

Person 1: Oh, he's a straight queen!?
by Jace Jaxon August 10, 2009

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Pronounced; Sha-moo-dihk

A shamudick is a usually white penis that is heroically large in size, but not monstrous. The shape of such a penis is akin to a dolphin, long and increasing in width towards the head of the penis, although not necessarily slender at the base. A shamudick (also known as dolphindick) is very well maintained with high standards of hygiene and shaving. It is even attractive to hetrosexual men, for a reason they can not explain in detail. A shamudick is both shower and grower, starting somewhat impressive in size when flaccid, and growing to a regardable size when erect.

The owner of the first original shamudick, Taylor (Fratpad) often accompanies a display of his penis with the sound effect of a bleeting dolphin, which suggests he is ridiculous as well as he is loveable, and also perhaps that he is in fact part dolphin.
Taylor: Eee-eee-eee-i-ee-i (whilst waving his penis around)

EvilOne: It's the shamudick!
by Jace Jaxon August 10, 2009

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Pronounciation; Mack-see-dance

A Maxidance is a very flambouyant, impromptue and unsophisticated creative motion of body performed usually by a gay person or alternatively a very gay acting straight person (straight queen). The maxidance is performed as an expression of doubt towards one's sexuality, and is never scheduled or announced. This dance can last anywhere from two seconds to a minute or more.

The creator of this dance, Max (Fratpad) has demonstrated that in order to perform it, a person does not need any sort of musical, rythmic or dancing skill at all. All that is required is a low sense of self esteem and weak moralistic values. The dance is performed better however, by power bottoms and latent homosexuals.
A guy that claims to be straight, but who wears wifebeaters and jacks off his friends for money on camera, walks into a nightclub and does a very flambouyant, unusual and random dance for a few moments.

Person 1: Look at that homo doing the Maxidance

Person 2: That's Max himself!

Leo: He's going home in September...I want him to leave the country!

Flipntony: Wah!
by Jace Jaxon August 10, 2009

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A fishwife's chore is the sexual act of slitting open a straight wound in a females cheek with a sharp edged tool (a knife), as a male, and then proceeding to penetrate this wound with your erect penis until climax, for sexual pleasure.

This sexual act is most popularly thought to be no more than an urban legend, although it has a following amongst perverts and extreme fetishists who dabble in such materials as snuff videos and the like.
Person 1: OMG did you see that sick shit that I found on the internet? I forwarded it to you the other day...

Person 2: Oh that fishwifes chore thing? Fucking disgusting...he cut open her cheek and fucked it!

Person 1: He should be hung publically! Dirty bastard.
by Jace Jaxon August 10, 2009

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